Katia: Tame metaphorical equine

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Apr 142014
 

Dream wrote:
Tell Aggy you think that’s fucking stupid and impossible.

You, ah… you’ll try, you say. Though you ask the ghost if he has any more specific directions. The whole thing with unicorns and bridges is a little… abstract.

Mysticism is abstract, he says. If you think in concrete terms, you’ll only get concrete results – like things falling downward, or objects stopping when they hit something else. You have to think a little less like the world and make the world a little more like you think, and thinking is rarely concrete. Unless it is. It depends how your mind works.

You tell him that your mind is kind of a fucking mess.

He says that’s the best kind. Messes have the most going on, and the most that can happen. You just have to bridge that gap so it happens outside you rather than inside you. Like… an orange.

Like an orange, you repeat. Yeah, he says.

The ghost neglects to go into any further detail.


Roxforbraynz wrote:
Katia: Do a little practice first. Start with something small, like one of the puzzle pegs. Since it’s lighter, it’ll be easier to tell when you’re getting closer to something that works.

Alright then. If he’s not going to give you any cohesive advice, it’s time to start experimenting with this. He’s right; you’ve used telekinesis before. You just need to focus it.

Experiment one: weaponizing puns. That seems to be a pretty reliable route for you.


Tryffin wrote:
Look, you might not get what this ghost is saying to you but come on you should just WING it like always.


Anon44 wrote:
Now don’t become a raven lunatic, Katia. You’re still able to use Telekinesis no matter how hawkward it may seem. No fowl play here. Just wing it!


Tempy wrote:
Do it! Do the thing! The brainy movey thing! Don’t go all bird-brained on us!


AK wrote:
Let’s wing it. I think that whole table might be beak-ining to take flight! If what that guy is talon you is cere-ously crow-rect, then I bet you’ll make that table fly! Egg-specialy because it’s a table without clipped wings. It was made to soar! You might still be a fledgeling when it comes to this, but I have faith in you. Toucan do anything you set your mind to. Just stork to it! Even if you don’t take right to it, it’d be okay. No harm, no fowl.

Oh my fucking gods.

These aren’t even good. Like, half of them are just variants on “wing it”.

But no, it doesn’t look to be having any effect.

Hold on, hold on, hold oooon, the ghost interrupts. You’re still trying to brute force it.

You ask him what he means. He explains that your amulet is reacting, which means you’re trying to force a full-on, mentally vocalized spell past it and it’s stopping you. Heck, you should be able to feel that. It feels like… like trying to pee when you don’t have a urethra. You tell him you’ve never not had a urethra. He thinks about it for a minute, then concedes that, yeah, maybe that is an experience unique to ghosts.

But you said your magic sets things on fire, right? That’s raw magic, the sort that takes willpower. You’re muscling magicka into energy and then throwing it at the world.

The old arts like Mysticism are softer; you’re taking energy that’s already there and changing how it presents itself. Lifting an object with pure magical energy would be like trying to push a cart that has no wheels. Instead of applying force, you should be building a wheel!

I thought this was about unicorns, not wheels, you say.

The ghost tells you that if unicorns and wheels are that different to you, then you might be looking at Mysticism wrong.


wrotewrotewrotewrotewrotewrote wrote:
he’s telling you to try and figure out how to use magic by seeing how those cat puns triggered your flame magic. Looking back, those puns hurt your feeling and then a fire started. Looking at the situation logically (ironic I know), it would appear that maybe your fire magic was triggered whenever you had that feeling of being hurt. And this conclusion also may lead to the possibly that maybe your magic is controlled by your emotions. So think back to what you felt when you used telekinesis in the past, maybe that’s the key to using it.

Alright, now that seems like a step in the right direction.

When you used fire magic, it wasn’t the cat jokes that were powering it. It was the fact that they hurt you. You were using them and enduring them anyway, and like the ghost said, that’s willpower. You used it to ignite magical energy.

If the other animal jokes were able to trigger your telekinesis, then there must have been some deeper emotion they were triggering. When you used them, you guess you felt… confused. So… maybe telekinesis is powered by confusion.

IT’S NOT WORKING.

Additional resource credits:
Cider – the usual

>

  • Kazerad

    Sorry for the inordinately long wait on this small update! Last week I was DM’ing a tabletop game for some friends, and shortly after that my grandmother was hospitalized. I don’t know which one of those this fanbase would consider to be a more reasonable excuse. Let me know!

    • Bacchante

      Yes.

      • Kazerad

        That isn’t even an answer! >:

        • VariedCookies

          Erm… no?

          • Flam3

            Let’s say maybe.

          • ADECOSTAR_ELITE

            Most likely.

          • SrLupinotuum

            ¿ehmm… no? (spanish version)

        • Nachtrae

          Probably then??

        • Raiu

          Reply hazy, try again

        • Floflo

          You would not make a good mysticist.

        • ADECOSTAR_ELITE

          It is now.

        • Fatality

          Quite possibly. Maybe not, though.

        • 2D

          Perchance?

          • Noximiliem

            Excuse me, but is this the 2D that did all the shadowrun stories on /tg/?

        • WhoopteDo

          DM’ing is obviously much more important. I hope your grandmother didn’t interrupt your DM’ing.
          😛

          • CardiacTasty

            Uh, that’s a really unfortunate way of phrasing that.

            My condolences Kazerad, if a random internet dweller’s wellwishing means anything to you. Hope your family gains some closure. And as a side, your observations are not only masterful but also as useful as usual.

          • KaorHashinake

            And that’s what we call a “Funny Aneurysm Moment”.

      • Bacchante

        “I don’t know which one of those this fanbase would consider to be a more reasonable excuse.”

        Yes.

    • Entropy

      D&D is serious business, we understand. Which edition?

      • Psithief

        He never said anything about D&D. There -are- others.

        • thehivemind33

          Well he did say DM’ing and not simply GM’ing.

          • Derrath

            Yes, but DMing is generally the more used term regardless of the game being played.It just comes naturally sometimes, as I’ll admit to sometimes say that I’m DMing a game of GURPS or something, even though GM would be the right term to use.

          • ADECOSTAR_ELITE

            General Motors is a fine company to buy automobiles from. I’m sure there is nothing wrong with using their initials. Although copyright may be an issue…

          • Kazerad

            Is DM improper for games besides DnD? I had never thought of that, but I guess it makes sense.

          • Nachtrae

            Eh, don’t worry ’bout it. Whether you be a Dungeon Master or a Game Master, you are still the Master of your very own universe. And you have to deal with pesky little players that are simply intent on wreaking havoc in that perfect little world!

          • Alex Franklin

            Judging by your storytelling skills, I think you’d make a good one, regardless of what you call it. As long as you talk like Jesan, giving wry smiles while subtly hinting at an ingenious puzzle you worked into the game.

          • [Witty Username]

            It’s a legal thing actually, wizards of the cost has a trademark on the term dungeon master, so other tabletop games can’t use that term when describing the guy at the table who isn’t the PCs.

          • KaorHashinake

            Well, if it doesn’t really have to do with DUNGEONS, I guess not.

        • Nulla_Metus

          He did show Quill-Weave playing D&D in one of the side stories.

        • anon

          go check his tumblr. It’s based on some obscure Swedish game with the interesting twist that allows it to only be played once.

      • SuperGnome

        Was thought I was sure what the answer was until I read this thread, damn. …nerds. ^^;

    • unclevertitle

      Well that depends… was your grandmother hospitalized in a tragic D&D accident?

      • Guest

        Mine was, you heartless bastard!

        • Mizana

          She rolled a 1 too many times.

          • Bryce Coleman

            She kept challenge my character too many times… -_- hoped she learned her lesson

          • Commentatorius

            This comment would be funnier if she hadn’t died

    • Don Crothers

      Both are reasonable, but being a professional Terrible Person, I’d be more inclined to forgive time lost to DM than time lost to damaged grandma.

    • CardiacTasty

      13 frames and several hundred words.

      If this’s a small update, my drawing and/or writing career is seriously screwed.

    • Moo?

      Nobody says I hope your grandmother will get well soon? Wow rude… I hope your grandmama gets well soon kaz

      • Kazerad

        Aw, thanks, talking cow! Your priorities are admirable.

      • CardiacTasty

        Welp, there goes my sense of decency.

        Here’s hoping your GM recovers quickly Kazerad. (Lols, get it? Cause we were talking about DM’ing vs GM’ing just a few… Yeah. You get it. :/)

        • As I cry, ‘Dat Cat’

          Funny how future events throw unintended context into old comments.

          Makes this post almost ironic.

          • CardiacTasty

            Painfully so. Ah well.

          • KaorHashinake

            And that is the prime definiton of the Funny Aneurysm Moment.

      • pride-and-parliament

        Well, I suppose if it was ever the time to be recovering from death, it would be Easter. Best wishes to your zombie grandmother!

        I’ve had an experience similar to yours. Here’s my advice. Cope however you need to cope. If it didn’t bring you to tears, don’t try to go into depression; if you’re sad, don’t try to avoid your feelings. A death affects everyone differently. If your initial reaction is an immense sadness or shock, you should grieve as much as you need. If your initial reaction is apathy or confusion about what to feel, don’t stress about it. Your feelings aren’t going to change; trying to grieve is not going to make you any sadder. You aren’t a bad person if you aren’t so close to them that you can’t go on living without them. Other people aren’t total sociopaths if they don’t grieve as much as you.
        Hopefully this is at least somewhat helpful advice. …Yeah, probably not.

        • CardiacTasty

          Just… awesome.

    • DerpyFan4eva

      the fanbase would say the DnD is a logical excuse. the humans would find the grandma a reasonable excuse, and the demons would be pissed off either way, so who gives a buck?

    • Mitch

      Sí

    • Mitch

      When do u think you could update it bye *no rush*

    • Kagji

      Both are good reasons

    • questionmarkface

      Both are. As someone who never had grandparents I would definitely want to be bedside.

    • Sir Prize

      Tempted to go into a long, emotional spheal right now.
      I won’t.
      I’ll just say that I feel ya. Granddaddy was Hospitalized not terribly long ago, And we were very close.

    • idoliam

      I just found Prequel yesterday and finished it today.

      Screw excuses. You’re Motherfucking Kazerad! Also, I hope your grandmother gets well soon.

      • Kazerad

        I appreciate the well-wishes! While I haven’t really mentioned it here, she actually died a few days ago, though.

        • Fatality

          Oh damn… My condolences, Kaz…

        • Nulla_Metus

          I offer my condolences as well. I suggest chocolate, it helps.

          • Kaytavo

            mine as well. also I suggest vodka and pot, works better

        • weeshful

          oh, I’m so sorry.

        • Pip

          Just found Prequel a few days ago. So sorry for your loss.

    • DORPDORP

      GOOD SIR/MADAM YOUR FACE

    • Sly Cooper

      The Tabletop one.

    • Swordbreaker2034

      What is DM? O.o

    • Iridell

      Deeply sorry for your loss, if my condolence even factors in at this point. I just found Prequel today and am caught up, because I couldn’t shut off my computer it was that good. Keep doin what you’re doin.

    • darezaK

      Hostias, que llevas un mes sin hacer nada eh…

  • MrPepsidude

    Her face in the 2nd panel. “Is this motherfucker serious?” I love it.

  • Contrast

    I have a question. Are commands submitted for previous updates still eligible to be used in future updates, or must they be re-submitted for consideration even if they still apply to the current situation?

    • Kazerad

      They’re kept in the list, which is basically a huge searchable pile of commands right now. I’ll probably clear it once the current ones stop being relevant though.

      • unclevertitle

        It being searchable is definitely a good idea. Downright necessary.

      • Can you make it searchable for us as well? I want to see what my fellow insanity whisperers are saying to her.

        • Please do this. It would be great for a good laugh.

  • Rentok

    Maybe the problem is that you’re the one that’s confused. Maybe that’s what the ghost meant, you can’t worry about what’s going on, then you’ll just end up confused because things are happening that aren’t SUPPOSED to happen. Maybe try and get the world to be confused, and just… don’t worry about it. So if you want those pegs to float, then they’re going to float. Why? Because mysticism. Whatever. It doesn’t matter. That’s just confusing and why should you care. They’re gonna float because they’re gonna float.

    • Rentok

      So let’s say, for instance, that you think you don’t know how to use your magic. If you go on thinking that, then you’re probably right. What if, instead of thinking about how you don’t know how to use your magic, or trying to use your magic, you just make the peg float? What would happen? Don’t answer that, it was rhetorical. The peg would obviously float. Why doesn’t matter. So, whatever you’re thinking, instead of thinking that, remember that pegs float if you want them to, and ghosts talk to you, and you have magical telekinesis powers. Why doesn’t matter. Reality is confused and needs a mystic like you to remind it how things are. And things are the way you say they are, because you’re Katia Managan the awesome kickass witch hunter. Why doesn’t matter.

  • Ashley the Magic Fox

    From what I’ve gathered, Mysticism is alot like bullshitting a gullible and/or drunk GM who’s forgotten his books.

    • Psithief

      That is exactly right.
      It is especially true since there is no matter, it’s all (effectively non-sentient) spirits and magicka doing a very convincing job of impersonating matter.
      So what happens when you convince those spirits that they should be doing what you tell them they should be doing?

      In Skyrim, Alteration got telekinesis when Mysticism ceased to be studied as its own school.
      Here’s a book on alteration (http://www.uesp.net/wiki/Lore:Reality_%26_Other_Falsehoods):

      Reality & Other Falsehoods
      Summary of the basic principles of Alteration magic
      It is easy to confuse Illusion and Alteration. Both schools of magic attempt to create what is not there. The difference is in the rules of nature. Illusion is not bound by them, while Alteration is. This may seem to indicate that Alteration is the weaker of the two, but this is not true. Alteration creates a reality that is recognized by everyone. Illusion’s reality is only in the mind of the caster and the target.
      To master Alteration, first accept that reality is a falsehood. There is no such thing. Our reality is a perception of greater forces impressed upon us for their amusement. Some say that these forces are the gods, other that they are something beyond the gods. For the wizard, it doesn’t really matter. What matters is the appeal couched in a manner that cannot be denied. It must be insistent without being insulting.
      To cast Alteration spells is to convince a greater power that it will be easier to change reality as requested than to leave it alone. Do not assume that these forces are sentient. Our best guess is that they are like wind and water. Persistent but not thoughtful. Just like directing the wind or water, diversions are easier than outright resistance. Express the spell as a subtle change and it is more likely to be successful.

      • Nina

        sort of like magical politics, and you are all the voters.
        ironically the forces are dumb too.

      • Lemeres

        So you should argue that the object is a bird instead, so it can fly about as it pleases?

        • Psithief

          That’s just overcomplicating things.

    • FoolishOwl

      There’s a theory that part of the point of TES III: Morrowind, is that this universe only makes sense from the perspective of a hero that deliberately breaks the fourth wall. At least, Nirn is the creation of a schizophrenic, dreaming god — so yes, you can BS the universe into changing shape.

      • Psithief

        Nirn was a team effort.
        In the end, the team wasn’t happy with the results.

        The spirit that inspired it had his heart shot into the ocean (where it became a volcano), his dead, broken body became the moons, and, as a result, his mind scattered into Nirn (where it provides heroes with the power of save/load game).

        That’s a lot more like multiple personality disorder, rather than schizophrenia.

        • FoolishOwl

          You’re right — I was making the common error of using “schizophrenia” to mean “personality disorder”. I don’t know if you’re familiar with the “Hunt for the Amaranth” discussions on the Lore forum on Bethesda’s site, but a lot of this gets discussed in detail.

          • Psithief

            After looking into that briefly (i.e. anything connected to Michael Kirkbride), I say that’s all just a never-ending “fanwank” of non-canon that will never amount to anything.

            There’s making slightly humorous observations (“Shor and the power of quick-load”) and there’s taking it too far.

  • Soadreqm

    Oranges have deep mythological significance for the Dunmer people. The Tribunal temple venerates them as sacred, and some apocryphal Ashlander legends maintain that the Daedric Prince Azura will one day make them grown on Vvardenfell.

  • I like this new comment system, it’s like a news site! Quick, someone argue with me about the politics of Tamriel!

    I, for one, think that the Leyawiin-Elsweyr phasco is just plain ridiculous. The mane himself let the Imperials keep the land, but nooooooo… Those damn Renrijra Krin folks go around ‘freedom fighting’ and threatening all our lives. Nothing but damn terrorists, I say. ANYONE WHO DISAGREES WITH ME IS A TERRORIST TOO!

    • Don Crothers

      You right-wing nutjobs are all the same, preaching about the right to arm bears! Bears kill!

      • Quit strawmanning me! Bosmers are the ones preaching for the right to arm bears, since they are the only ones who can control them! THINK OF THE CHILDREN! THE IMPERIAL CHILDREN!

        • Rentok

          What does arming bears have to do with the children? The children are invincible- there’s no danger to them. Bears couldn’t hurt a hair on the childrens’ heads- but armed bears WOULD be able to kill anyone trying to KIDNAP children. Think of the children; vote Gives-Swords-To-Bears.

          • Giona Hawkins

            I vote ANARCHY.

          • CardiacTasty

            DIPLOMACY! START 9! LEFT LEFT LEFT LEFT

          • Justsomedude

            ヽ༼ຈل͜ຈ༽ﾉ Katia cries or Riot ヽ༼ຈل͜ຈ༽ﾉ

            ヽ༼ຈل͜ຈ༽ﾉ Katia cries or Riot ヽ༼ຈل͜ຈ༽ﾉ

            ヽ༼ຈل͜ຈ༽ﾉ Katia cries or Riot ヽ༼ຈل͜ຈ༽ﾉ

          • 🙁

          • Elzipper7

            ヽ༼ຈل͜ຈ༽ﾉ I DON’T SEE TEARS ヽ༼ຈل͜ຈ༽ﾉ

          • D’:

          • Elzipper7

            And once again, the world is in balance.
            That’ll do, Kat. That’ll do.

          • Helixorbust

            WE NEED TO HIST FISTY

    • Soadreqm

      Yeah, Elseweyr “gave” the land to the Empire like Elseweyr “gave” them the Halls of Colossus. The only thing “threatening our lives” is the Imperial Mages Guild. WAKE UP SHEEPLE!

  • TheFounderUtopia .

    Yes it is.

  • Cheshire

    Well, clearly, Katia’s just not confused enough.

    I propose that the solution be to give her completely irrelevant and baffling advice until she reaches a state of critical confusion overload, thus allowing her to flip the peg game with ease.

    • unclevertitle

      That still sounds like brute forcing things.

    • Wolf_Plague

      Reminds me of Goblins webcomic. They too, had a puzzle triggered by confusion.

    • Don Crothers

      Isn’t that exactly what Aggy’s been doing this whole time?

      • Psithief

        No, it’s just that he’s super arrogant and in his own little world because that’s how you be a witchhunter. 🙂

    • Macdoo

      Isn’t that basically what everybody does anyway?

  • Zapzya

    If you think about all Aggy has talked about, he has talked about giving the object a reason to move and he has talked about how we can’t brute force it. If we go back to the unicorn and bridge analogy, he says that if you try to ride the unicorn, you waste a whole lot of energy, and that if you go under a bridge it will take your head off. So what if we guide the unicorn under the tunnel, while not riding it? By giving it a little nudge, a few soft words, it will do what you want. So that’s what we need to do. And as for the confusion part? Honestly if this isn’t confusing you by now you are the smartest person alive.

  • Zapzya

    Also, why do some of the flash animations work on my laptop, but not on my desktop? Like Katia Managan: Take Control of the Situation. On my laptop, works fine, on my desktop, comes up with lines of HTML coding or something.

  • stupidjellyfat

    I’m as confused as her.

    This entire situation with Aggy is not being understood right now.

  • Psithief

    I submitted my first command! (I really hope I understood the situation as well as I thought I did.)

    Also, this lack of understanding even the basic magic is getting stale and boring and I want something new to happen for once.

  • Bluescale

    If it was the confusion, then after this entire conversation with Aggy Kvatch would have already been a cloud of loose bricks, stones and other architectural elements bobbing around aimlessly in the air.

    • unclevertitle

      Or it’s about the proper application of confusion or the proper response to confusion. All that’s clear is that it’s not about just the sheer amount of confusion.

      Unlike the emotional pain of cat puns which can be unleashed in brute force the confusion has to be applied strategically. Or maybe the confusion is supposed to prompt something else.

    • Psithief

      I wouldn’t call that confusion at all! It was a combination of annoyance and arrogance. She was thinking “Bird puns?? That’s a terrible idea and that’s not going to work!”.

      She needs to feel like she already knows how this works! A very tricky task indeed, which is why ‘thinking like a witchhunter’ is required.

  • spidren

    Alright Katia, he’s explaining things from a perspective that’s a tad too different from your own for you to grasp it properly, so just try this and justify it later: You’ve already moved the peg. The world thinks the peg hasn’t moved? The world is the one who’s wrong, you moved the peg. That doesn’t seem possible? Well it was possible and you did it, so the world should hurry up and sort it’s stuff out ’cause you totally already moved that damn peg. Not your fault it wasn’t paying that much attention at the time. That peg was -moved-.

    • Psithief

      You need to put that in the submit command box, not here. 🙂

  • Uacher

    I guess building stuff out of the snow is out of the question… unless… you use MAGICK for it!

  • TacticalCelebrant

    Of course your telekinesis is working! Haven’t you noticed the snow has stopped moving?

    • TacticalCelebrant

      Seriously. We can see them talking and Aggy’s hands moving while the snow just sits there. Frozen, as it were. That’s some pretty powerful telekinesis to keep all of that snow in place. She must be really confused.

      • Psithief

        Noo, don’t make the wait between updates even longer by prompting Kazerad to animate the snow!

  • unclevertitle

    Hold on a second… that last panel. Has Aggy just noticed Katia talking directly to us!?

    • Hibou

      Psh, who needs a forth wall anyway.

    • ADECOSTAR_ELITE

      I missed that… it seems he has! Ah well, he’s insane already anyway.

  • SpaceKing

    Quick Katia, find a cart and steal the wheels! For SCIE… MAGIC!

  • Nachtrae

    Seems to me that rather than birds, it’s fish puns that made things fly:
    http://www.prequeladventure.com/2012/03/1717/

    Flying fish. Heh.

    • unclevertitle

      It’s any animal puns other than cat puns. Because only cat puns make sense when applied to Katia.

      • Nachtrae

        I think not. On the page prior to the one I linked to, Katia specifically said that she was trying out a whole bunch of puns to pass the time. For the most part, nothing happened, until she got to the fishy one. Which is demonstrated again by the puns on the linked page. The fish pun Katia herself came up with made the shard fly and do a flip in the air.

        “Hopefully you won’t flounder like a fish out of water when it comes time to show it off. “

        • unclevertitle

          Yet way back here: http://www.prequeladventure.com/2011/06/490/ the amulet of silence flashed as a result of some bird puns.

          And here: http://www.prequeladventure.com/2012/07/2107/ she didn’t use a single fish pun yet managed telekinesis fine (in fact its the most impressive telekinesis she’s shown yet, so there may be something to that Unicorn metaphor).

          So yeah.

          • Nachtrae

            You’re right, I forgot about those. I just mentioned the fish part because I had gone back to where she first used telekinesis and find out the situation again. 🙂 I was reading up on that to find her emotional state because of that one command in the comic.

            So think back to what you felt when you used telekinesis in the past, maybe that’s the key to using it.

            Looks like FEAR is the emotional state for telekinesis. 😀

          • Pajaul

            I commented on this, but it looks like it was deleted… so… I hope it didn’t delete my command too… um, short version, if it was fear, we would have seen loads of it during her nightmares. I proposed it was courage, not fear. You’ll note she only used TK when she stopped running from the fire. I think the fish pun reminded her of the slaughter fish, thus the fear she faced when she went down the well. This all makes me wonder if commands are still being voted on since other can’t see them… hrm…

            -Stop right there criminal scum!

          • unclevertitle

            Except courage isn’t really an emotional state, however it is a response to an emotional state…

            Hmm… Experiencing pain and then choosing to endure it instead of shying away takes willpower which Katia used to ignite here magical energy.

            Experiencing fear but choosing to walk forward in spite of it takes courage… but I think that’s going right back into willpower. And as far as we can tell and according to Aggy willpower is not the source of mysticism.

            Mysticism seems to be all about rejecting reality and opting for a more favorable outcome, as such it’s basically seeing reality and saying “That’s dumb. What if instead…” and then arguing that what if into actuality.

            So a better source would be curiosity. Which can be sparked in response to something confusing. I know often times when I’m confronted with a fact or pseudofact that I find confusing I try and look it up or reason enough to make sense of it, sometimes I literally have to stop myself from doing this when I recognize that there is no sense at the heart of something.

            Where I would stop to save myself unnecessary mental fatigue, a Witchhunter must continue.

            This makes sense since confusion is less an emotional state as it is an intellectual one.

            Hehehe, lo and behold a quick google search confirms:

            Destruction
            Governing Attribute: Willpower
            http://elderscrolls.wikia.com/wiki/Destruction_%28Oblivion%29

            Mysticism
            Governing Attribute: Intelligence
            http://elderscrolls.wikia.com/wiki/Mysticism_%28Oblivion%29

            So it’s not fear or courage we should be looking into, but curiosity, analysis, reasoning. Intellectual things.

          • Pajaul

            We know magic is fueled by her emotions- we’ve established that her emotional reaction is what caused magic to occur. We also know trying to intellectualize it is the same as trying to brute force something. Logic and reason, the foundation of intellect, don’t really have a place here in the same way leverage and force have no physical place here. For mysticism anyway. It’s more about feelings, both profound and subtle. I’d say bravery is a response to an emotional state, fear, which takes courage. To have the courage to face fear, to have the courage to admit failures, to have the courage to stop running. These are what triggered her previous uses, amulet or no. and I would be more apt to say Courage is more of an emotion than confusion or curiosity for that matter. …but that’s just me.

            -Stop right there criminal scum!

          • Nachtrae

            Going by that last bit, it would also really explain why the shard Katia made tumble about in the air before ignited afterwards. She was forcing it through her will, and willpower is the attribute of Destruction.

            So would that mean that Katia is going to have to up her debate and intelligence skills so she can argue with objects until they fly away?

            And to return to what you said about curiosity (I’m going back and forth in your long long post here hehe), that would also make sense. She first discovered telekinesis by making up all kinds of puns at the bottom of the well. Katia was actively trying to distract herself from the threat of slaughterfish by doing something that made her curious. Seeing if she could come up with any puns that showed an effect.
            Heh. Curiosity killed the cat…….

          • Nachtrae

            Hm. To be fair, she was still running quite frantically during that one big fire. And who wouldn’t really. Anyway, to use magic during your dreams or nightmares……. well, if it is a lucid dream. Or the dream decides to give you them. Ah, I remember a dream where I first ran and hid from Raptors, and then ended up fighting a magic duel against Jack Sparrow on floating islands…

            Nightmares however, tend to take things away. When you’re trying to run, your feet are frozen. When you try to hit something to defend yourself, your strikes have no strength. That could also apply to magic.

            Kazerad has to update faster! I want moar comic! I wants answers!

  • Skin Ticket

    Katia, are you aware that one of the human definitions of mysticism is “Dreamy confusion of thought?” Perhaps you are onto something here. Perhaps it is the mental energy produced by said confusion that is being utilized to make things fly. Perhaps try picturing these thoughts as waves of energy bouncing around inside your head. Now close your eyes and picture yourself directing these waves towards the pegs. Don’t try to hard, don’t strain to think, don’t even bother with gesticulating. Just close your eyes and let the scenario play out in your head. See if that does anything.

    • Bam

      Try submitting that as a command, brah.

  • Isoitiro Hyuna

    Can someone please explain how a lot of these thoughts halfway through a post are relevant despite the first half of the conversation in this panel not happening until the whole panel is released? Is there like a thread or something where Kazerad says like “Ok so far Katia did xyz can you guys give me some abc puns?” or something? Or are people just guessing that maybe she’ll try to weaponize puns soon? If my explanation of my question sucked, I’ll try to clarify if needed.

    • Psithief

      Lots of guessing, based on past experience. A lot of these suggestions haven’t been posted merely LAST update, some might have been sitting around in the suggestion pile for TWO updates.

      I imagine that when Kazerad isn’t getting the useful responses (or just wants to drag something out) he’ll pick some of the worst ideas suggested so everyone knows that’s a bad example of a suggestion. 😉

      Right now he’s sending a very strong “Please, no more puns for this challenge.” message to us readers.

      • Isoitiro Hyuna

        Okay, thank you. I had been assuming that a lot of them were just guesses, but the specificity of some submissions is downright eerie. I’m obviously just not thinking like a witchhunter.

    • Nachtrae

      It’s the other way around. Based on the comic, readers give suggestions or commands as to what Katia should do next. The panels are made after the commands 🙂

      • Isoitiro Hyuna

        Like I said in response to Psithief I know that a lot of commands are just guessing, but some are oddly specific. I guess people just essentially do a little railroading and Kazerad is that good at making it flow naturally. 🙂

        • Nachtrae

          comment thingies didn’t feel like showing me Psithief’s reply to your comment until after I had given you mine. :p
          So yea basically: People are silly. They give silly comments from time to time. And Kazerad stores them until they are less silly and more useful. 😀

  • The Urban Deuce

    What, no “flipping the bird” puns? But it’s so perfect!

  • tronn

    “Start with something small, like one of the puzzle pegs. Since it’s lighter, it’ll be easier to tell when you’re getting closer to something that works.”

    As a side note this is opposite to how mysticism works – you’d want to be working against common sense.

    • unclevertitle

      Exactly! The weight of an object shouldn’t matter when the object is moving itself! Considering the weight makes it sound like we’re trying to flip a table on our own or something. What are we? A barbarian?

      • SrLupinotuum

        Mysticism requires enter in a moment of madness to work, something learned in Skyrim finally

    • Hello. A lot of people still aren’t getting this.

      You have to submit a command, not post a comment, if you want to tell Katia what to do. If you look in the Extras tab in the side bar, there is an option to ‘Submit Command’. All you have to do is click on that, or tap on mobile, and type the command you want.

      • CardiacTasty

        I’m… pretty sure if anyone gets this, it’d be tronn. He has been here since, like, the beginning of time. At least, he’s got his muddy footprints all over the fanart section.

        It’s kind of like telling a dinosaur that comets are dangerous.

        • tronn

          Hey! I’m not that old! Besides I’m a very modern model of robot skeleton, I hardly ever tell young whippersnappers to get off my porch.

          Even when they really ought to.

      • Psithief

        tronn’s quoting someone else’s suggestion anyway. tronn was directing that at us, fellow readers.

  • Ericgi231

    Is there any particular reason why all the images are gifs?

    • Psithief

      Well, some of them are animated. Mixing file formats seems like more work than sticking to just the one.

      Is it problematic for you that only GIFs are used?

    • unclevertitle

      Consistency of file format since often there are animated panels?

  • Terry

    Wait, my memory is like a sieve. When did Katia display telekinesis?

  • Kobold

    Has anyone really been far even as decided to use even go want to do look more like?

    • CardiacTasty

      So long as I can you have any, it doesn’t seem like the other day to be able. What if you took me? That wouldn’t either.

    • Alex Franklin

      I just submitted that as a command. I hope you don’t mind.

    • xKiv .

      Giraffe.

      • Floflo

        Stupid long horse

  • Jack

    I saw that peg move. Second from the top-left. Don’t know why you didn’t see it. Looked like it didn’t want to be in the hole anymore, like, holes were troublesome, confining. But you don’t want the peg to not move, you just want it to not be in the hole anymore. Like how you don’t want to be a homeless slutcat attached to pineapples like they’re the fruit version of Nepeta by not drinking.

    • JJR

      Which panel are you looking at?

    • xKiv .

      They are all moving. Everything is moving. Katia just wants them to move in a slightly different direction, is all.

      • tronn

        Is it, though? I mean, Nirn is the center of the universe that everything else rotates around, but is the planet itself revolving?

        • xKiv .

          Now you are NOT thinking like a withchunter at all. You shouldn’t be letting facts disagree with you. You should be letting facts let YOU disagree with them.
          So, everything moves. And we are at the center of universe, so every direction is essentially the same. The pieces, and the table, could be moving down, left, right, front, back, or up. Why not?

  • CardiacTasty

    Wow, no Cider resource tag? I’d swear I could pick out some bits he might have worked on.

    • Kazerad

      Woah, fuck, I knew I was forgetting something. I hope nobody saw that. Except you. It can be our secret.

      Eventually I should probably just stick him down in the credits at the bottom with Ch’marr.

      • CardiacTasty

        It’s almost like your godlike attention to emotional detail has trained us to pour over each update looking for goodies. :B

        Seriously, you must spend inordinate amounts of time reworking faces in every frame, which makes it impossible not to connect with Katia at a surprisingly, wrenchingly deep level. If that’s what psychology classes with an emphasis on aesthetics can do for your drawing, sign me up.

        • Bob

          What’s really incredible to me is that, so far as I can tell, there are only four or so variables in the facial expressions which create that connection. You could probably pick out twenty or thirty little things in a picture of a face, and that (or more) is conveyed here between ears, eyebrows, eyes, and a mouth. And half of what I just listed are usually just curved lines.

          And then you’ve got Aggy, who’s probably either the easiest or the hardest to define facially due to being batshit insane.

          • …I think the level of your understanding and the vindication/validation I feel from your last three comments is making my brain melt.

            I, just…
            There are no words.

            You. I’m going to upvote the shit out of you.

          • Bob

            I have occasionally been known to cause brains to pool out of ears in a gray-pink syrupy mess, but that was mostly just in Canada. I’ve never pulled it off long-range before.

            But, seriously? I see what people do in the downtime here. And I see why there are 500 goddamn comments on this.. thing.

      • JJR

        I saw it to. Don’t worry though, I am sure that your secret is safe with the people that it is safe with.

      • Stray Cat Acid

        Excellent! While you’re at it, you could update that NON-EXPIRED COPYRIGHT notice that I totally haven’t been letting my OCD itch at for the past half-year.

        Katia’s methods have proved very effective. :3

      • OcotoBabies

        I see all.

  • Elosan

    Silly question, I did submit a command, but I realized a made a spelling error. Would it be alright I submit it again but with the spelling correction? I know spamming commands is discouraged. I just want to make sure before I submit it again.

  • Mck

    shouldn’t the amulet be visible in the 10th panel?
    (like in the 6th panel of the last update)

  • Moo?

    Unicorns, wheels I just don’t understand… why katia isn’t getting it…

  • ganonlink

    Oh man, Aggy is looking at the camera in the last panel. I hope that has some significance to how commands relate to her powers of something.

    • JJR

      Artist, not camera; this is a web comic.

  • i like how in the last panel, Katia looks directly at us speaking out loud, while aggy looks at her and then in our direction. She can see us somewhat by that logic.

    • JJR

      Well, she is becoming a witchhunter; breaking the fourth wall is to be expected.

    • SrLupinotuum

      somebody needs to make a fanart telling us what’s seeing

      • I like to think she sees all command senders as one being… so basically an Eldritchian Horror….

        • JJR

          So… twitch plays Katia?

      • CardiacTasty

        How ’bout fanart from none other than Kazerad himself?

        • that… might be the best gods-damned piece of prequel fan-art I’ve seen yet.

        • SrLupinotuum

          😀 good idea, really good idea…

  • Fritts ShockTrooper

    HHHNNNGGG, can’t wait for Katia to figure this thing out, hope some helpful commands come in…

  • Scott Fernandez

    Maybe it’s not confusion, but rather *imagination* that Katia was harnessing. The strange bird jokes were causing Katia to imagine the world as different than it is, and the confusion was the result of her brain saying, “Wait, that’s not right..” Maybe Katia just needs to imagine better and learn to ignore that little voice telling her it’s impossible.

    • Fritts ShockTrooper

      i don’t think Imagination is the Key, perhapes something more with the feeling of lift itself would be the key, though a clever twist would be that there isn’t an good answer and it really is just random Fantasy crap that powers it.

    • tronn

      Personally I think it’s fear, not confusion that powers telekinesis – remember that she discovered the ability while hanging on for her life in a well? Perhaps that is eveb the reason why someone is terrifying her in her dreams, to awaken her latent talents.

  • Stephen Grenleski

    Katia, maybe you should try using the indignation you felt when you heard the cat-puns and jokes and use that feeling to use your magic.

  • Sheogorath

    STOP EVERYTHING. Time for cheese. CHEESE TIME HAS CONCLUDED. FLIP THE GHOST. LISTEN TO THE TABLE.

    • Nulla_Metus

      This is why you are my favorite Daedric prince. Thank you for the cheese. I’ll put off skipping rope with your entrails for now.

    • LP

      Yay cheese! Now we need recently warmed dogs!

    • CardiacTasty

      This man deserves all the upvotes.

    • why not Mi’kal the Liar time? I suppose i could procure the fishy-sticks that he lacks.

  • SoItBegins

    Peg: Lift from the table.

  • SixteenCharacter(s)

    Maybe it has something to do with birds being able to fly, telekinesis being basically making things fly? Maybe just imagine that that peg can fly just like a bird, even though that makes no sense.

  • Salamore

    Well fuck…I just caught up….

    • CardiacTasty

      Welcome to the orgasmic hell that is reading Prequel for the first time: massive feels followed by crippling emptiness.

      If it helps, you can ween yourself off a bit by reading the side stories, you might try to sooth the aching hole in your heart with decent fan art, and if all else fails by creating a Disqus account and commiserating with the rest of us. Other than that, strap in for hard times, cause the updates are lean and a sad cat addiction is one hell of a motherfucker.

      Of course, it is worth it though.

    • Scat Cat Diary

      Get yourself an RSS app. It’s basically the best thing ever.

      • CardiacTasty

        Seconded.

      • Floflo

        Personally I use http://protopage.com/ to follow a bunch (25) of webcomics. it makes it easy to spot when one of them has a new page.

      • … I use Chromes Bookmarks feature…

  • FoolishOwl

    Maybe the ghost’s analogies about unicorns and wheels and oranges don’t work for you, just for him. Magic is about changing the rules. Maybe the idea here is to somehow bypass your understanding of the conventional rules of reality, and tap into your own ideas of how you want things to work, how you expect them to work in the instant before you think rationally — your own personal dream logic.

    • Woodledude

      That’s actually quite brilliant. Please tell me you submitted this as a command.

      • FoolishOwl

        Thanks. I did submit it as a command, just after I posted here — I hadn’t gotten around to figuring out how to submit one before, so I was a little confused.

        • Woodledude

          Like… Oranges?

  • Lawyer McLawyersson

    Katia needs a lawyer, they can bend the rules to their will. They’re masters of mysticism.

    • Alex Franklin

      Wait, but if she lives in a world based on an RPG, then what she really needs is not just a lawyer, but a rules lawyer. One who specializes in gaming cheese. And utilizing insanity. Oh crap, I don’t know the exact line of reasoning here, but it’s going to end with Sheogorath, isn’t it?

  • atableisjustareversebudgie

    Katia, listen to the ghost. He says you need to stop trying to access energy inside you and start using energy that’s already in the world. Think like Newton. What makes things stick to the ground and not float off into space? Why, gravity, that’s what!

  • ShenHibiki

    I love the comic. I love the reactions.
    But as soon as it said ‘confusion may work’, I thought ‘no, it isn’t’…

    … then she looks at us and says the same. Now I kinda need help to stand up, my sides hurt XD
    Then I see Aggy is ALSO looking at us…

    Help ;w;

  • Katia’s already used her mind to prove that cups of wine are just GLASSES OF WATER and a Countess is just a KNAVE. Why not come to the simple realization that those puzzle pegs are actually FLOATING PEGS?

  • Alex Franklin

    Hey Kaz, how long do we have to submit commands before you’re too far along on the next update to use them?

    • CardiacTasty

      I’ve been wondering this myself for quite some time. Of course, Kazerad may or may not get the time to respond right away, seeing as Real Life just threw a wrench into his existence.

    • Moo?

      Mate his grand mother died

      • Alex Franklin

        I know, and he has my condolences. I wasn’t trying to sound all “RAARGH UPDATE!!!”, I just wanted to get an idea. I posted this comment before I knew about her death.

  • weesh ful

    When we actually get a breakthrough, it is super satisfying. I’m happy to be in a place where I believe it will happen. Or else I’d be good mystic material.

  • Truegreen

    Hey! Guess what’s keeping that peg on the board huh? I bet you don’t know! There might not even be something keeping it down. As far as you know pegs only stay on boards because that’s what people assume happens. Imagine all the things that peg could do if it could fly. Just imagine the multitude it could accomplish just by floating. You know why it hasn’t floated yet? It’s because no one has ever given it a chance. That’s the long and short of it. Give that peg a chance Katia, just look at that peg sitting there stuck to that board. You know it doesn’t want to stay there, it wants to fly. Believe in it Katia, let it free.

  • The little voice in your head

    Obviously you’re looking at this like a problem that needs to be solved, as opposed to a solution that’s just waiting to be used.

    The point of the matter is that the less sense mysticism makes, the better it’ll be. By believing that those pegs are pegs, instead of sprigs of cauliflower, they stubbornly remain pegs. And bound by gravity. I mean, just think how water breathing works. It doesn’t give you gills. It just turns water into air through suspension of belief. So, chop chop. Imagine that the table, and by extension the pegs, are being so repulsed by their sedentary nature that they willingly expel themselves from the forces of gravity.

  • Anon

    Is it bad that I actually understand why Aggy can see similarities between a unicorn and a wheel? I guess that was supposed to be a one-off joke about how he’s insane but maybe he’s looking at how they can be applied to a situation. Both a unicorn and a wheel are both potential vectors for transport, so is mysticism reducing something to its simplest relevant form and manifesting it?

    • unclevertitle

      Nah I got that too. Additionally both wheels and unicorns are things that have logical reasons to be physically attached to a wagon.

      Personally I think Mysticism is more of an argument against reality and why things should work differently. It’s such a convincing argument that reality agrees temporarily. I think reducing something to its simplest and most relevant form is a useful technique in making such an argument though.

  • Nina

    You were confused and the confusion was directed at something! right now you’re just confused. try to be confused about the pegs. Are those even wood? are they plastic? what are they even for? seriously consider it? what is the practical reason for them to even be there? What type of wood is the table? Is the table ALSO plastic? How is it STILL snowing?

  • The_Gentlemanne

    So, I’ve submitted it to the suggestions, but reading Katia’s thoughts on this page made me think of this:

    “You’ve been trying too hard, thinking too much. Relax.
    You just have to go… a little crazy. And then, suddenly, it all makes sense, and everything you do turns to gold.”

    The first line’s part of the message for level 16 in Oblivion – figured it applies. She is (or rather we are) overthinking everything and trying to apply logic where logic isn’t concerned.

    The second line is the level 12 message, and Katia realized it earlier in the story, but she seems to have forgotten it since then.

    She can’t rely on puns or logic. She’s just got to will it to happen.

  • ThatGUyyouhate

    acording to the comment the first one is more reasonable then the second.

  • Ridesdragons

    What I want to know is where the mid-post commands come from. Unless people just somehow guess what was gonna happen before you posted it, and then you used it for the post.

    • unclevertitle

      Those commands can generically refer to everything that happened in that last update as well, Kazerad picks and chooses the commands he wants and word things so that these commands apply directly to text in the middle of the update.

      So no, it’s not really us guessing how things are going to go (at least not entirely) and more Kazerad wording things sometimes to appropriately fit the commands.

  • KDS

    New reader incoming!

    I love how the in the last panel the ghost is looking at her like SHE’s the one who’s crazy.

    I’ve seen some of the responses to this dilemma, and I remember one fantasy book that pretty much summed up what the ghost is getting at perfectly. It’s not an effort, just an understanding. Not willing something to happen, but knowing something will happen.

    I haven’t the foggiest how you even apply a concept like this, though…

    • Nachtrae

      Easy.
      You deny reality’s reality and substitute your own

      • The Time Squid

        So basically:
        “I reject your reality and substitute my own!”

  • Shnurui

    But it is working. Your aim is cat-astrophic. That poor squirrel over in the tree got it right in the…., er, never saw the rock. I have a feline-ing that if you took a cat nap, you might be able to cat-nip this problem right in the flower. Hey, isn’t that rock awfully shiny?

  • The Ruling King

    Hell, let’s just skip Mysticism and hop straight into CHIM.

    • JJR

      And have Katia Zero-Sum, no thank you.

      • But she might not zero-sum. She might realize that she can control the godheads dream in a small way

        • JJR

          So, would she start submitting commands to herself, or maybe she would start giving us commands?

          • oh god, on second thought, CHIM is a bad bad bad idea. It would ruin the fun of messing with her head.

  • Powmonkey

    IT’S NOT WORKING.
    -Katia on the site

    • xKiv .

      And it’s the first thing I see when coming to check comments!

  • Agent Cay

    Here lies Kazerad’s Grandmother.Her last words:
    “Trim your hair, hippie”

  • Joseph

    Close your eyes, and imagine it moving. Keep your eyes closed until you see it move in your mind. And know for a fact that when you open your eyes, it will have moved, despite what physics or logic says.

  • DiabeticCat

    Here is a free spell I can teach you passed down to me by a wise sage. The Bardic Knock spell, simply turn your hand into a fist and gently tap on a door.

  • OldSchoolRPGDude

    Yo Kazzazzle: To minimize your headaches, you might want to make a “development environment” on your server: a little password-protected area that has a copy of your stuff where you can tinker without creating a Farnsworth Parabox.

  • Savannah Johnston

    DO WE HAVE DISQUS COMMENTS?

    WE HAVE DISQUS COMMENTS.

    THANK YOU KAZ.

  • JJR

    Bugs? wait, Bugs are not very effective against ghosts and weak against fire. So if Aggy acts as the tank and Katia pulls out her racist fireballs they should be able to solve all the problems your having with the website.

    • unclevertitle

      An intangible ghost acting as a tank? That’s just insane enough to work.

  • questionmarkface

    No! Bad site! Stop breaking!

    Maybe Katia’s magicks are working, and it’s just causing issues on our end. She is staring directly into the fourth wall.

    • JJR

      Is she trying to break the site, so that Kazerad can’t put her through even more tear inducing pain?

  • WoodenBladeValor

    Kazerad, your work never fails to inspire me. Don’t you ever give up.

  • Guest

    Good day everybody!Great,Magnificent,Omnipotent Zdenek is back to posting comments!

  • Sheogorath

    Hmm… Confusion. I seem to recall that memories of your affiliations with specific daedric cults caused quite a bit of that. Some more than others. Perhaps you should try focusing on those past experiences in order to create a focal point to direct your magicka from.

  • Sheogorath

    Maybe you have to lose control to gain control, nothing worth having ever comes for free. Well, except for your clothes, you kinda need those.

    • VariedCookies

      If you ain’t out of control, you ain’t in control!

  • Moo?

    I feel sorry for kaz because a relative has just died and people are still experiencing him to update.

    • I see humans but no humanity.Even this cow is more empathic than you guys!

      • Moo?

        Auto correct ruined that post for me. *expect is what I was ment to say

        • CardiacTasty

          I think we can edit comments, let me check.

          EDIT: Yep. Handy. :B

  • An Explosion

    Take your time, Kazerad.

    • Psithief

      Take someone else’s time!

      It’s what a witchhunter would do…?

      (It’s not the easiest idea to use as a meme, I admit.)

      • CardiacTasty

        Word of the Day!

        WWWHD (wo͝od), meme:
        1.
        W hat
        W ould
        W itch
        H unter
        D o?
        2. an excellent paradigm to live by. Arguably the best.

        See also: WWKD

        • groggarioth

          What Would Khorne Do?

          Smash the fucking table, he don’t hold no truck with Psykers or MAges, cheap cowardly bastards not even using their own power, but stealing someones else’s to do their fucking job, should just burn them all.

      • An Explosion

        Second thought, it’s been like three weeks, man. I crave moar.

      • An Explosion

        Witch hunter…don’t get it :/

  • Raiu

    Ok… My command is rather stupid in this one. Maybe using bravery puns will do…

  • VariedCookies

    Hang about, I’ve seen that third panel somewhere before.
    Somewhere meaningful: http://www.prequeladventure.com/this/story587.gif

    That was when she first ‘perfected’ pyromancy. Perhaps this is when she can perfect telekinesis!

    • unclevertitle

      Yeah… although back then she first tried insulting the apples but determined that she had to be the one to feel the burn for the magic to happen.

      If her confusion now isn’t making the magic happen, maybe Katia shouldn’t be the one being confused. Instead she should be confusing! Confusing the pegs into thinking that they should move despite the fact that they shouldn’t even be thinking. Confusing reality until it gives in and makes an exception for her.

      Now that’s mysticism in a nutshell.

      • VariedCookies

        In order to guide the magic she had to begin it close to her, maybe to concentrate it. I reckon a similar method might be helpful, something like pretending to lift the pegs with her hands… only from a few metres away. Then again, mysticism is confusing as balls and I’m so thankful it’s Katia and not me going through this dunderfuck of a lesson. Because you know what, what you said also makes sense.

        …Too much sense.

        • The Time Squid

          If that’s true… is it bad if I completely understand how Mysticism works? O_o

  • MuKen

    In the last panel, the ghost sees Katia looking at the audience, and is like “Who are you looking at??”

    • Moo?

      Heh how did I only just notice?

  • Koolpin

    Wow you’re ignoring like.. everything he just told you. So here: Birds fly and move on their own. But how can -they- fly, they aren’t even pushing off of anything you see. Therefore birds are magic, and you can learn from them.
    Also thinking about unicorns might not work for you, supposedly they wouldn’t come near after all your experience. You should think about a different magic horse instead like a pegasus WAIT THEY HAVE WINGS TOO YOU HAVE TO WAVE YOUR ARMS ALL OVER THE PLACE LIKE A BIRD OR BIRDHORSE NOW
    and maybe
    the piece will get the idea and move around too. …. if only a really
    really really small amount. But that’s what you’re trying for anyway?
    And if that doesn’t work maybe just imitate the horse and huff some air on it or whistle like a bird.
    Is it possible to do both at once?
    More importantly, does Aggy like asparagus?

  • the mightiest of specks

    Confusion! That’s it! Everything this ghost is telling you is based on confusion! The bird puns are based on confusion! You just need to confuse yourself and focus everything you are thinking towards that peg! Just keep thinking! The more random and insane, the better!

    • JJR

      But these instructions are perfectly clear and not confusing at all.

  • SorenMareth

    So if the Cat puns hurting you tied into your desire to endure pain and thus extends logically illogically to the exercise of will and in that context the lashing out and moving of pain through hatefire we should continue the metaphor to hypnotic level.

    Bird puns Confuse you. You don’t like being confused it’s an emotion that ties into your negative self concept of being dumb so you seek to understand, to create a framework where in you can categorize the pun or get it. And this is an act of intellect. So to mysticism you must go through an act of intellect not necessarily tying into bird puns.

    I beleive this may be done most logically through comparison and equivalency as the Dumner has hinted.

    Afterall what are a unicorn and wheel? No more importantly what do they have in common in his comparison?

    The answer to that is simple. They are tools and methods of locomotion.

    To a mage, no to a man this is simple then, if you continue your selective comparisons in fashion of ‘ a unicorn is a magical form of self propelled that needs power and is tamed by men and mer’ a wheel is so totally like that.

    If I take a wheel and give it magic juice to make it move when given more magic juice it is exactly like a unicorn.

    No better than that, ‘this method of propulsion is obviously broken, its not moving like this other one so I being a man who fixes shit should obviously and without any logical opposition be able to make it right’. Or ‘If I am a fuckup i can break it so hard it goes so wrong its right another way by taking something that does not do any of those things and then make it wrong in that way.

    As such the key to mysticism is building these logical illogical frameworks and dragging our mutable reality on with them.

    It’s magic bitch. Deal with it.

    Afterall the Aedra shape Mundus just like that and mages work on that language.

    So who cares if that table is two hundred pounds. You got magic. All that table is an object, an obstacle, a bit of wood statistically insignificant to what three hundred foot tree it came from. Really its less than a twig and even more easily discarded. Really you stopped a goddamned mage without even using magic and they are way harder to muscle then twig table so by definition that’s an order of a magnitude less force and so using the tiniest bit of magic should send that insignificant speck into the the Throat of the goddamn world.

    And if anyone says different? Fuck you. I’m an atronach bitch! If Talos his decided to smite with a bolt of thunder from the heavens I got fify fifty chance of absorbing it and sending it right the fuck back. Anyone bastards shit out of luck you can’t touch this.

    • Psithief

      Just checking: Is that wall of text supposed to be a command?

      Commands go in one place: in the submit command box.

      Comments are for reader/author discussion only.

      • SorenMareth

        Yeah. Found that later and submitted it there. And it’s not a wall of text. There are paragraphs and everything.

        • As I Cry, ‘Dat Cat’

          We’ll settle on ‘hefty’.
          It’s a hefty screenful of text.

          • SorenMareth

            Does the logic at least work with what the Dunmer has been talking about?

          • As I Cry, ‘Dat Cat’

            Umm, yes. I think so. Mostly. My favorite part:

            Anyone bastards shit out of luck you can’t touch this.

            Also words words words wOrDS WORDS.

          • is there an avatar image of that face for dA?

          • As I Cry, ‘Dat Cat’

            Sure! Whipped out two versions: Words or No Words?

          • Thank you kindly, as I now have a new icon for my everything!

          • As I Cry, ‘Dat Cat’

            In that case, here’s a better version for sites who don’t have ridiculously small size requirements.

        • Psithief

          It’s a wall if I can’t mentally climb it, right? 🙂

          • As I Cry, ‘Dat Cat’

            You, sir, have just won the internets.

  • Bonzohazard

    Kaz doesn’t seem very distraught over his grandmother passing. It could be one of those situations where he keeps spare relatives in the closet to feed the grave in case he needs an excuse. Nobody freaks out that hard over a grandparent anyhow…. They’re old,, their time was fast approaching and everyone knew it. Come on Kaz, kick us an update…..

    • Psithief

      You have forgotten that Kazerad isn’t into the whole “webcomix R srs bizness” mindset. There is no ‘news blog’ on this site and not a single link to his social media presence (e.g. tumblr).

      Just as a matter of course, the more people he collaborates with on each update the longer it will take (e.g. flash updates). Kaz is a perfectionist.

      (Don’t mind me, I am having much too much fun with disquis.)

      P.S. Not being distraught doesn’t mean not having to do more things than usual right now.

      • Guest

        If you’re writing a story like Katia’s, you’ve probably had way too much experience with emotional quick-fixes, with the knowledge that you have a way out; its cost is just to give up and start over later.

        Emotional quick-fixes play hell with your productivity.

        On top if it all and for better or worse, Kazerad is a perfectionist. Part of me wishes so. hard. for something as simple as a guarantied two updates per month, but I recognize being a perfectionist means any disruption, any bump in the road leads to ridiculous amounts of delay. If you can’t stop craving a particular brand of chocolate, if you can’t get one stupid sentence to come out right, if the sun is shining too bright, your muse curls up and refuses to create for the day. And then? Welp, you’re screwed.

        It’s really hard to be someone you’re not, especially when you haven’t the foggiest how to fix yourself besides trying not to be who you are. Triply so when that something is so fundamental to your character; is it so wrong to want to create something clever and show it to your friends? It’s hard to believe that a flaw.

        In the end, it’s simple, really. Just consistently be spontaneously creative. Oh, and make sure to remember you do have a way out of all the pain, it just requires you to give up. Again.

        Have fun!

        • CardiacTasty

          Double posting via comment deletion. Weird. Plus now it’s counting the comment as a guest post, so I can’t do anything ’bout it. Oh well…

        • Kazerad

          I wouldn’t say I am a perfectionist (nor that the story is necessarily advocating emotional quick-fixes). It’s more that I am just extremely bad at time estimates.

          Like, I entered the 7 Day Roguelike competition last year. I’m still working on it despite being over a year late.

          • CardiacTasty

            Forgive my flailing, the more complete and yet ironically still incorrect version of this got half-haphazardly moved. First times for everything, right?

          • Psithief

            Non-sequitur explained adequately.

          • Psithief

            I am basing that impression from your eagerness to fix all typos anyone finds.

    • As I Cry, ‘Dat Cat’

      It could be one of those situations where he keeps spare relatives in the closet to feed the grave

      Your viciously practical mindset pleases me; do go on.

      Also, kill yourself. I love my grandparents.

      • guest

        Please don’t tell someone to kill themself..

  • CardiacTasty

    EDIT: Lolz, tumblr is better for something like this. I’m nothing if not fickle.

  • Chivalry Dark

    You know what is funny in Elder Scrolls a simple Dragon with his wreath atack doesn’t kill atleast you are a low lvl but in Dark Souls any giant Dragon gives a fuck your level or if you are hacker, it kills you pathetically. I-I

  • Chivalry Dark

    A Dragon encounter in cyrodill will be a good episode!

    • Chivalry Dark

      And all Run for your lifes!!!

  • burritosneior

    I’m like… super sad! I started reading this a few days ago and now I’m all caught up! Found this just by some random person linking it on a forum. I love it. Please keep going frequently, hah.

    • r

      same with me ;-;
      went by too fast

    • She-Who-Waits

      Get used to it. The update with the peg puzzle took about 6 months or so!

      • Kazerad

        It was just three months, and that was a one-time thing >: ! I’ve just been out-of-state these last few days for a funeral.

        • am

          you doing okay, kaz?

          • Ridesdragons

            seconded… er… 5th, I guess. I hope you’re handling the situation well.

    • Alex Franklin

      Have you read the side stories yet? They’re fun.

  • El Rata

    Believe it or not, I actually got the “like an orange” part… =P

  • 300th comment! Sorry. Ignore me.

    • JJR

      I tried to ignore you, but that meant I was paying attention to your comment, and you by extension; but when I was paying attention to you I was ignoring your comment, thereby ignoring you.

      I think I need a witch hunter to untangle this mess.

      • Irrevenant

        More like you need a mess to witch hunter this untangling.

        • Moo?

          Or you need a untangling to witch hunter this mess

          • JJR

            Maybe a Mess Hunter to untangle this witchery?

          • Nice one

  • Complectus

    So yeah, started this after a post on tumblr and read the entire series. This is one hell of a ride man!

  • Loolo

    Oh my god this is so awesome

  • Waiter”gottit…”

    Man. If you’ve give up on making the story go, u should release the character so someone less lazy would!

    • Guest

      go home please…there is no need for people like you

    • As I Cry, ‘Dat Cat’

      …must…refrain…from telling people on the internet…to kill themselves…
      HRNNGGGG

    • Someone Less Lazy

      Woah man. Just, woah.

      I’ve already got a shit ton of things to do, I couldn’t possibly take on ‘making another story go’, let alone something this incredibly high caliber.

      So stop volunteering me for all your shit.
      It’s getting annoying.

    • Alex Franklin

      Good sir or madam, we can understand your apparent frustration at the lack of updates. However, please understand that making the story go has been temporarily interrupted by the regretful occurrence of events outside the author’s control involving a funeral, and as such he is only just getting back into writing.
      However! There is really no need for the character to be released just so someone else may use her in a story. In fact, YOU are, at this very moment, completely free to finish the story yourself! Just think of the possibilities at your fingertips! Write a fanfiction depicting how YOU believe the story shall unfold! Surely you wouldn’t mind doing so, seeing as it was your idea?

    • Ridesdragons

      “someone less lazy”

      maybe if you stopped being lazy and took the 2 seconds it took me to find a comment from kazerad h̶e̶r̶ himself, you’d realize s̶ he has more than enough on h̶e̶r̶ his plate as is. http://puu.sh/8x9uq.png

      Edit: ok, to be fair, not searching up someones gender is far less lazy than not looking a mere 5 comments down. Plus, I’m rather new here, and don’t use tumblr/twitter, so I’d never come in contact with any sources from there, if there are any. shush lol

      • Nulla_Metus

        I’ve never heard anyone reference Kazerad’s gender before. Are you speculating or do you know that Kaz is female?

        • Pretty sure Kazerad is a man, judging by the bits and pieces you can find around the internet.

          I think he uses Quill-Weave as his avatar not necessarily because of gender. As awesome as she is, she just deserves the love; plus, he did speak through her for that MLP Design Contest. That and, you know, she’s a writer, he’s a writer, it just kind of makes sense, right?

          • Nulla_Metus

            Quill-weave IS a fantastic character. I thank both CardiacTasty and tronn for their clarification.

          • Ridesdragons

            holy crap I said her instead of he and that’s what people freak out about lol. Personally I think kazerad is secretly a ukanorn, but what do I know

            Edit: Also, I edited my comment with slash text and whatnot, fixed the error, and explained that I couldn’t have found any of those things you linked lol

          • JJR

            An Ukanorn, ’cause it starts with a vowel sound instead of a consonant sound.

          • Ridesdragons

            but would you SAY “an ukanorn” out loud? it’s like how you’d say “an x-ray” even though x is not a vowel. since the sound in ukanorn is, I’m guessing, close to unicorn, you’d say “a ukanorn” not “an”. that’s because the sound actually starts with y, which is not a vowel. except when it is. I swear, english is a form of mysticism.

          • JJR

            Yeah, if the u in ukanorn is pronounced in the same way as in unicorn, with a long-u, it would be ‘a ukanorn.’ I guess i use the short-u sound because Katia said it when she was drunky; I went with the one that was more wrong.

          • Funny what causes an explosion of comments. I guess we all get a little excited when we get to share something with somebody else, even if it’s as minor as the gender of a cool person drawing sad cats for the internets.

          • Ridesdragons

            I love how you put this

            still, I literally got everyone to jump on this. even kazerad (even if he was only stating that he doesn’t own sandals). I just wasn’t expecting this, especially considering what I was commenting on. this has more comments than the original comment XD although I guess that’s for the better. the original comment wasn’t exactly a nice one.

          • Psithief

            Stalker!

          • What can I say? The internet is a scary, scary place. :B

            Actually I was somewhat worried the post would come across like that, but finding all that sauce was as easy as poking around using Google. I didn’t have to trawl any forums or ask around on dubious imageboards, so that makes it better, right? I’m not one of those creepy people we always hear about, right? Right??

          • Psithief

            Emphatic emphasis!

            You were following me on Disquis at one point. That was odd.

            I’ll guess that, like the rest of us, you are too lazy to be a stalker.
            I WAS WRONG.

          • To be honest, I thought you might be Kazerad in disguise, but I’ve since concluded you’re just another highly-intelligent person who happens to use similar sentence structure and phrasing.

            …Wow. I might have a problem.

          • Guest

            So that’s why I’m following this comic!

            We both use the ellipsis character! (Alt+0133 → …)

            Kazerad, if you ever need a decoy, I wish you the best of luck.

          • Moo?

            Wow you know more that me and I have microphones and cameras all around his house! In his kitchen, livingroom, bathroom, bedroom, bathroom, attic, bathroom and bathroom… yea I uhh… its better if I don’t explain…
            Note to self: Destroy evidence

          • I find nothing wrong with this!

            …every man deserves to have four bathrooms.

        • tronn

          Kaz is a dude. He loves vests and wears socks with sandals.

          • Scat Cat Diary

            looks like tronn might actually know Kaz

          • tronn

            I do not know Kazerad personally, but I know that he’s dreamy.

          • Kazerad

            I do not even own sandals! >:

          • As I Cry, ‘Dat Cat’

            Though you’re rocking some pretty sick socks in that pic.

          • Those… aren’t sandals?

  • Gracie

    Hey guys, hey. Sparrow the Author your Squawking and Swallow your complaints- they’ll Eggsecute an update at their own pace. 🙂 No need to Parrot the same “whhhhys” at the poor author. XD

    • Moo?

      Those jokes where so terrible they where good

  • Impressed

    Happened across this by accident, read the whole thing in a day. Keep working on this- it’s really goddamn impressive. Gave me half a dozen new ideas for my current novel.

  • Alex Franklin

    This is really strange. Comments I downvote appear higher up than comments I leave alone when sorted by best.

  • JJR

    Tame a metaphorical unicorn? Katia already tamed a literal unicorn that one time, so this shouldn’t be too hard.

    • JJR

      Wait never mind, I just looked back at the side story, it was actually an Ukanorn.

    • That… is actually a very good point.

    • Alex Franklin

      Too bad she was all horn and drunky at the time. I don’t know if that’s the best mind-state to emulate…

      On second thought…
      ☞Mysticism is about using insane logic to influence reality.
      ☞Dreams are known for having nonsensical logic and being easily influenced by the mind of the person in them.
      ☞There are many similarities between being drunk(y) and dreaming: You’re not in total control of your actions, the weirdest stuff can make perfect sense, you fall over a lot when you try to run( well, I do anyway), and you have a hard time remembering what happened when it’s over.

      Maybe… maybe trying to get into a drunken mind-state is the best idea. What do you think?
      The words “just go a little crazy” come to mind…

      • YC aSadCatTri? I<3ta CYrCatSad

        Maybe… maybe trying to get into a drunken mind-state is the best idea. What do you think?

        Oh yes. Whatever takes her closer to bone-crushing despair wins in my book; bring on the drunken mind-states.

  • She-Who-Waits

    Come on Aggy! Turn this cat’s boring life around!

    • YC aSadCatTri? I<3ta CYrCatSad

      If by:

      turn this cat’s boring life around

      you mean

      abandon her at her most emotionally-unstable point thereby driving her into new levels of broken and suffering

      Then I heartily agree.

  • Alex Franklin

    It seems to be powered by not confusion, but by a disjunction between expectations and reality where your expectations win. Like Aggy said, you’re embracing insanity just long enough to use it. When Katia used nonsensical insults on herself, she did so with the “reasonable” expectation that it would have some sort of magical effect, like the ones that actually hurt her did. She was confused as to what she was doing, but she wasn’t using willpower like before. She was just semi-convinced, for no particularly good reason, that weird bird puns would cause magic. Her partial conviction manifested as a partial telekinesis spell. Now she just needs to be totally convinced that she’s doing something right, regardless of it’s apparent impossibility.

    It occurs to me that these lessons in magic are in a way teaching her to be a better person( if a Khajiit were a person XD).

    Consider her first spell: A kindly soldier shows her that to succeed in life, she needs the will to not give up despite it seeming hopeless. By the end of the lesson, she believed in herself a little bit more, and had mastered the basics of fire magic, which is powered by willpower. Later on, she achieves feats of will she probably couldn’t have done otherwise– throwing off a super-charm minutes after being put under it, and then when all had failed, finally throwing down the bottle. When people had information that she wanted, she wasn’t afraid to grab them by the beard and demand to know everything, or chase them all over town.

    Now she’s getting another magic lesson, this time about telekinesis. What will this teach her? I think it’s going to be something about having faith in her own intelligence. Thinking outside the box, even when you seem to be stuck inside it. She’s a lot smarter than she thinks she is, and that’s inhibiting her. Hopefully she can think of some alternative solution to a situation with no good choices: playing into a scheming priest’s hands or starting all over again with no money. Is there another option? Can she outwit Stephan?

    • Moo?

      Tl;dr assuming its deep

    • Woodledude

      I was thinking something rather similar, actually, but this is a very well though-out articulation of those thoughts. Also, I completely failed to connect her current predicament to this new lesson of hers. Nice work. 🙂

    • Whoa, I never fully realized!! Not only does this story employ a magic system that’s based around correctly invoking the corresponding in-game attribute to cast from a specific School of Magic, it’s also standing as a commentary on how those attributes might actually apply to real life! As it becomes evident that in order to cast a fireball one needs to control their will, Katia (and through Katia the reader as well) is learning what ‘having willpower’ might actually mean when times are at their worst.

      I’ll grudgingly admit it; I appreciate when a game pushes the player to imagine how the wizard might be summoning a fireball by focusing his or her will, since the alternative is playing as a rather dull collection of statistics unrecognizable as something we could even begin to empathize with. It’s just that this is typically accomplished so clumsily and with such gratuitous amounts of brunt force that I come away from the experience wishing I’d never even wondered how it all works. But with Prequel this is conveyed with such finesse I didn’t even begin to question what I was doing until I found myself biting back cat puns while trying to give a presentation in front of 40 people. Plus, it’s so much more tasty and frankly more than a little inspiring to see someone go the extra mile and, through these attributes, give not just an enjoyable experience but an emotionally useful one too.

      Congratulations to Alex Franklin and, of course, to Kazerad; My mind. is blown.

      • Ridesdragons

        you have my respect for rapid-firing cat puns unconsciously in a presentation

    • As I Cry, ‘Dat Cat’

      Mr. Franklin, you win the internets for today.

    • Ridesdragons

      I actually put a command that goes somewhat along this when this update came out. the reason why she was able to move the object was because she was convinced that “if she does x, then y will happen”. before that, she was just convinced that “something should happen”, and after that, something did happen. and after that, it changed to the “then y will happen” format. in other words, since she was absolutely convinced that the object was able to move without any force, it did. Thus, it would actually be easier for her to flip the table than to move one of the wooden pegs. you’re essentially telling the 300 some-odd pound table that it weighs nothing. with the wooden peg, you’re following logic: the peg IS light, and therefor is easier for a PERSON to move. the table, on the other hand, is definitely NOT light. you would need to completely and utterly convince yourself that the table, in fact, weighs nothing. that kind of effort and thinking is exactly what is needed to move the objects around.

  • Moo?

    Just realised someone has 102 comments… well looks like im never gunna get to first again

    • JJR

      How do you see how many comments someone has?

      • As I Cry, ‘Dat Cat’

        Step 1: Click the tab thing.
        Step 2: Bask in the glory.

        • JJR

          Thanks.

  • I wonder if Kaz would be willing to have guest artists do a few pages every now and then…

    • So much yes! But no. :c

      Besides, I suspect it’s not the drawing that takes forever-and-a-day, but the writing.
      It’s hard to make dat writing.

      • Alex Franklin

        Maybe not to the main comic, but it would be fun to have some guest-written side stories. Like Homestuck did with Paradox Space! I don’t know if this comic has reached the levels of popularity where other webcomic artists know about it yet, though…

        Secretly, I’m hoping it keeps a relatively small fanbase, for completely selfish reasons: I want to get a command of mine included in the story someday, and don’t want more competition!

        I also sometimes worry that if too many people start submitting commands, the same thing that happened with Homestuck and Problem Sleuth will happen here: where there’s just so many commands that pretty much every course of action is covered and it becomes largely irrelevant whether the story is coming from the readers or not. That’s why Andrew Hussie stopped taking reader commands for his stories; he realized that whatever course of action he wanted for the story was probably being suggested by someone, so he closed the suggestion box and just wrote the story himself. Nothing wrong with that, but reader-driven stories are much less common and I want to experience more of them!

    • Brend

      By now its probably very hard for other artist to reproduce the art and writing of Kazerad without making it somewhat unfitting. A german chans /co/ even got so desperate for waiting for updates and started their own storyline with Katia, but its pretty much subpar. In the end sticking to the original and accepting additional time waiting is probably the best.

      • Kazerad

        Oh man oh man, wait, I haven’t seen this German thing. I have to see this.

        • OmgZdenek (those passwords)

          I am looking for it yet i cant find it anywhere!someone post link somewhere please…

          • Well, there’s my other link just below Brend’s post…

            And lols, those passwords. :B

      • …Sauce??

      • You mean this? German is hard.

        #8263: Hope the &%$@ dies in a fire.

        Huh. Even in Germany…

        • Wow. This is actually pretty good. I mean, for a fanfic of a fanfic translated to English from German, it’s definitely way better than I’d expected; color me impressed.

          Maybe fan made storylines aren’t as terrible an idea as I’d initially assumed…

        • Guest

          sad cats for life

      • Also, Brend, are you the Bernd who’s running the german storyline? If so, iz prretty gut so far… o.O

  • Sammiches

    The Submit comman thing doesn’t work.

    • Moo?

      Yes

  • JJR

    Katia keeps grabbing her left arm when stressed. Now I’m worried that she’s about to have a heart attack.

    • Racist Cat Day

      That’s what I keep thinking!

  • Bonzohazard

    What’s this?! Still no update? SURPRISE!!! Grandma must have been quite the old bird, never knew a funeral could go on this long. Stuff her in the dirt already, give us an update…. Oh, wait, are we going back to lightning conveniently striking again? Did the hordes of Sauron come steal your computer? What other whimsical bs might we be fed next? The excuses are becoming more exciting than the story itself!!! YAY!! Give us more excuses Kaz!!!

    • tronn

      Dude why are you acting like such a jerk? It’s an attention thing, isn’t it?

      • I grew up with a dude like this. He found reasons to complain about literally anything, stupid petty stuff like how fat people should pay more taxes for driving up medical expenses or how no one should pity cashiers who stand all day cause they chose to work as a cashier. I think he’s still living in his parents house; last I heard he’d just lost his job. Again.

        • Bonzohazard

          lol, the fat people paying more taxes thing is brilliant, I’ll be sure to add that to my repertoire! Cashiering isn’t a bad job… it doesn’t pay much, but there’s nothing wrong with it. As for living in my parent’s house… well, I love my mum and da, there’d be nothing wrong with it if I was!

          • This made me laugh. :B

            You know, I was on the fence at first, but you’re actually kind of a cool dude! I guess a little complaining isn’t so bad, especially when the people doing it are hilariously snarky. I don’t necessarily advocate such an entitled view, but I definitely feel a little bit of what you’re saying, if not for the same reasons.

            Keep calm and carry on, I suppose.

      • Bonzohazard

        Well, it’s two things really…. First of all, there’s no dead grandma, there was no lightning…. they’re excuses. He can’t just say: “Sorry guys, I’m playing teso” or “Look, I’m just not interested in doing this anymore…sorry about that.. I’m moving on.” Secondly, I’m a troll at heart, and I have a brutal sense of humor! 🙂

        • TruthSeer

          Agreed! Those who don’t want to do something always find an excuse. Katia is a great character, and this is a great history. The guy who make it is briliant, but also LAZY AS HELL! That’s just a fact…

          • Cobweb

            Forget about updates…. it’s too late: [URL=http://s28.photobucket.com/user/cybermasterdza/media/toolate_zps93d64270.gif.html][IMG]http://i28.photobucket.com/albums/c227/cybermasterdza/toolate_zps93d64270.gif[/IMG][/URL]

          • TruthSeer

            He, he. Really cool bro, and so true. Here I fixed the link for ya!
            http://i28.photobucket.com/albums/c227/cybermasterdza/toolate_zps93d64270.gif

          • Omgzdenek (forgot password)

            Guys i think those guys are anonymous fake accounts…Dont respond to them.

          • Ok here i am to prove its me :3

          • Racist Cat Day

            R.I.P. Katia. (>T.T)> </3

          • Incredible Pinaple

            Well, at least you did something instead of only complain. But seriously, give the guy a break. I sure he will soon get to it and we’ll have more CATastrophes on our yellow cat life!

        • Alex Franklin

          …we, um, have photographic evidence of a hospitalized grandma. If he faked that, I’m honestly impressed by the work he’s put into this alleged deception.

          • Bonzohazard
          • Monster10

            Better to give someone the benefit of the doubt than to look like an asshole when proven wrong.

          • Bonzohazard

            Who was proven wrong?! I still see no irrefutable evidence, all I have are my own conjectures… and they seem to be pretty on cue!

          • Alex Franklin

            A quick image search reveals that it appears nowhere else on the internet. Thus, the photo is at the very least genuine. He even has this long heartfelt tumblr post about what it feels like to lose a family member. I suppose it could still be some sort of trick, but honestly why go to that much trouble to avoid updating? Seems convoluted to me. 🙂

          • Huh. I think I just found conclusive proof that, even if one could claim it’s still an excuse (like how it’s still an excuse for me to say I’ll never know the pleasure of sprouting anything other than blond hair because damn my superior genes), Kazerad’s grammy did just pass away. But, uh, I think I’ll keep this one to myself this time, else I confirm all stalker suspicions you may have of me. Sorry guys. 🙁

            Not that we really need it, anyway. I mean, come on. Telling everyone that your grandmother died, just because you’re nervous that people will start screaming MOAR, MOOAR? What is he, like, ten?
            ___ —
            ( °)( °)
            –(

  • Marcus Marky

    Katia REALLY needed this ‘pick-me-up’ and even though this meeting only occurred due to that lucky green asshole’s intervention, him and his garden of clovers still really piss me off.

    • Retired Draugr

      I kinda like the Ork. He’s always so polite. And soon he will be invincible, since he has all the luck in the world.

      • JJR

        But if he gets all the luck, he’ll probably cause an integer overflow and then half the world gets overwritten by garbage data. Maybe that’s why we have never seen Akavir.

        • As I Cry, ‘Dat Cat’

          Nah, he’d smash the canary values before too much damage was done. Worst case? We get reset to a previous restore point, maybe just before Katia gets jacked by Grow-Upp.

          • JJR

            Had to look up canary values, very interesting. Even more interesting is that the random ones are created by, “an entropy-gathering daemon,” so I guess that would be the job of some daedra.
            Other thing, have we been remembering to save often? I don’t think we have pressed F5 even once, much less created a new save file from the menu.

          • As I Cry, ‘Dat Cat’

            Shit.
            Oh wait, we’ve got autosaves, we’re good. So let’s see, the last time we loaded a new cell would be when Aggy grabbed that table from the bar. At least, I think we’d get a save there. If ghosts can just float in and out of buildings, wouldn’t they have everything loaded like all the time? o.O Just how much RAM is this thing eating right now?!

          • unclevertitle

            Ghost’s must live in an extended open cities mod. Maybe that’s why their collision data never worked right…

          • JJR

            Auto-saves? If we keep relying on those we are gonna find ourselves stuck in some inescapable situation, doomed to die and reload in an endless cycle of misery.

          • Bob

            I think we’ve all been there before. Fortunately, for the most desperate of moments…

            Reload save
            ~
            tgm

      • Marcus Marky

        Doesn’t really stop him from being a dick to people though. I mean killing of that poor necromancer was totally uncalled for. I do see why people could like him though, it just doesn’t work for me.

        • JJR

          But it was called for. Someone going by the name of Tiger86 called for Dimitri’s death via slit throat.

          • Marcus Marky

            True, but ultimately it was the orc who decided to listen to his subconscious (Tiger86) and off the guy

          • Marcus Marky

            anyway point is he just irks me and that’s just my opinion on the matter

      • Monster10

        If luck is finite he has doomed us all.

        • JJR

          Doomed us, or freed us from a capricious force infinitely beyond the ability of mere mortals to effect, or even comprehend.

    • YC aSadCatTri? I<3ta CYrCatSad

      I’m hopeful we’ll see Mr. Gharag sooner than later.

      Slutcat is starting think she’s people again; a taste of reality would be quite refreshing. Refreshingly crippling, that is.

      • JJR

        I’m guessing that the next time we see him he has retired after getting rich from selling all that loot. There is no need for a professional such as himself to continue to risk life and limb when he already has more money than he can spend. The worst that might happen is he has to pay a fine to ASOTIL from robbing Katia, but he has the gold, and I don’t think fine money flows back to the victim in Cyrodilic Justice.

        • unclevertitle

          I’m still holding out the hope that Gharug will be captured and imprisoned and then become the main protagonist of Oblivion. Basically he gets so lucky that he gets chosen by destiny to be a big damn hero.

      • Marcus Marky

        Well while I do not share your sentiments about wishing suffering on others, I’d like to shoot down your theory of seeing Mr. Cloverfield again (movie references aside) we just saw him off heading in a direction east of not Kvatch and I have a feeling that we’ll be staying in Kvatch for a while longer

  • Anonymous

    I wish this new update would come sooner!

    • JJR

      In all likelihood it will come sooner than something. For instance I am 95% certain that it will come sooner than the update that comes after it.

      • As I Cry, ‘Dat Cat’

        I like this person. He makes all the funnies.

  • Ja

    Idk where or if i can suggest the quotes but ehh 😛
    Here’s mine 😛

    “Okay… not confusion, and not panic ether… so…. maybe…. rage or depression? that triggered the fire when you almost burnt down the chapel. And just maybe a less extreme version of that could work, so nothing goes out of hand. like…. anger and sadness”

    If it doesn’t work:
    “Eh. try realization.”

    If it works, but goes out of control like in the chapel:
    “I SAID LESS EXTREME. CAILM THE FUCK DOWN.”

    • Nulla_Metus

      On the sidebar, to the right of the sad cat, there is a “Submit Command” link. It’s not too hard to find. I’m glad if I helped.

  • Yewty

    Been a while since I checked up on Kat, still going strong I see.

  • Yewty

    Oh, yeah, and I hope your Grandmother gets better.
    Praise the Deer Lord,
    Yewty.

    • Bonzohazard

      She supposedly already bit it dude, and yes, the Deer Lord… there’s gotta be one for all the deer I’ve taken down in Skyrim.

      • That’d be Hircine, if deadra are close enough. He even takes the form of a White Stag, if elk are close enough.

        • Yewty

          Taking this too seriously, guys. .___.

          Also, another thing, why can’t we just wait patiently for more of the story? Unless your life revolves around this, then- well, actually, let’s stop there and say if it does that’s pretty sad. And secondly, pity the author. We have no right to tell him what to do. It is his choice to do what he wants, and we shouldn’t make him feel guilty about it.

          • Unless your life revolves around this, then- well, actually, let’s stop there and say if it does that’s pretty sad.

            :c *sigh* I know…

  • Cobweb

    Dam… still nothing. Man, you could have the decency of declaring once and for all, ok people… show is over! I wont be making those anymore, I’ve move forward and have other obligations now. You can go do something else…
    I mean. Come on! If u make a picture per week and write a word per day… it still would be faster than that!

    I feel like a fool coming here everyday.

    • Sklobington

      If it’s that much of a bother, get an RSS reader and subscribe to the feed. It’s really not that hard. And just because Kaz hasn’t updated for a while doesn’t mean it’s the end. Kaz said that he was going through some family issues in the first comment. Cut him some slack.

      • Zax

        Yeah, some of the best artists and writers have had to take month-long or even year-long breaks before going back to work. It’s better than having a set schedule and stuff, letting him work at his own pace.

        • Stray Cat Acid

          Good point Zax, I’m glad someone else sees the need for the occasional break. It just seems… unhealthy to do the same thing for years. I kind of wish Kaz could be like ‘I’m planning to take this month off, see you in a couple weeks’ without all hell breaking loose. Maybe he could choose a few specific months to relax, where everyone expects him to take a break? Something like Kazerad’s Nada Nope November?

          Lols

          letting him work at his own pace.

          I guess I’ll let him choose his pace this time, but I may withhold his allowance if he doesn’t update within the next week. After all, he has to learn that choosing one’s pace is a privilege that may be taken away by us, the fanbase that reads his free thing on the internet, if we’re not satisfied. We may even have to impose a set schedule and a curfew if Kazerad behaves too irresponsibly. 😀

    • I feel like a fool coming here everyday.

      I’m fairly certain Kazerad’s found some way to digitize ink mixed with heroine and uses it to draw this comic.

      • JJR

        I thought that the secret ingredient was moon sugar, or maybe skooma.

      • Ridesdragons

        wait, you’re saying that’s NOT how people usually write on the internet?

        … *hides digital heroine ink*

  • Garrus

    How long do you think it will take for the next update?

    • Scat Cat Diary

      it’s already been like four weeks so not much longer hopefully

      • A Sry Cat Adict

        Is that nrmal? i realy want to c Katia flip the table!

  • Omega 831

    The pain and suffering of keeping a web comic up to date would slaughter me. You do well Kazerad, be strong.

    • Scat Cat Diary

      it’s already been like four weeks so not much longer hopefully

      • Scat Cat Diary

        wrong comment, sorry

    • tronn

      Heh, it’s hard to tell whether you’re being sarcastic or not.

      • I think this is not sarcastic.I tried to start webcomic but hey….I made only 3 pages and then i quit.I am trying to start another one but thats just imposible.

        • JJR

          Reminds me of the time I tried to start a webcomic. I got as far as finding MS Paint on my computer.

  • RylanSword

    *EHEM* Cat insults= hurt= fire. Assuming, by the commutative property that we can disregaurd these middle steps, we can assume CAT UNSULTS= FIRE.
    Sooo, if bird puns= will to move something (fly something around)= motion/flight, then BIRD PUNS= FLIGHT/MOVEMENT!

  • Yewty

    Stop all ye fkin’ whining, and let him do what he wants. Stop crying about it, making him feel guilty isn’t the way to go.

    • JJR

      Maybe the name should be changed to, “Making my fans cry: The Adventure.”

      • Cobweb

        Is it just me, because it seems that the more people complain, more this guy make sure not to update.

        • Um. You might have a bit of a reverse casuality fallacy jacking with that perception. I really hope that’s the case, cause if it turns out that the regularity of the updates depends on the compliance of the entire Prequel fan base, I’m just going to give up and go crawl into the corner.

          So in answer to your question, it’s not just you, congratulations! 😀 Quite a significant portion of mankind agrees with you. It just so happens that you’re all likely wrong. :'( But cheer up! Your significant numbers means you can simply pummel those who annoy you until we stop moving! 😀 Truly, it’s something wonderful to be on the side of the majority. :’)

          • Anon

            I disagree, CardiacTasty. There are at least a few artists that become more and more procrastinating as he becomes more and more popular.

            It’s not like “the regularity of the updates depends on the *compliance* of the updates,” but that the more that he puts it off, the worse he feels about the fans that DO like him.

        • NameGoesHere

          It’s definitely just you. If you’d ever interacted with him outside of this comments section you’d know how he sympathizes with the readers who are frustrated about the lack of updates and does generally try to at least let us know that he’s still working on things.

  • Anonymous

    If I was going to Mary a khajiit out physical appearance, katia would be the one.

    • JJR

      Why? It’s not like she looks that different than any of the other khajiit that we have seen.

      • VariedCookies

        None of them are even SLIGHTLY similar!
        Racist.

        • Ridesdragons

          “what’s different about us?”
          “oh, you know, you’re over there, and I’m over here. and you’ve got a mug. and you’re wearing different clothes. other than that, yea, we’re pretty much the same.”
          *BANNED*

        • JJR

          I think you mean speciesist.
          Also, I am not speciesist, some of my best friends are khajiit.
          But, I most definitely do not have a, “cat thing.”

  • Timeheart

    I’m kinda thinking it must be the other way around. Not confusion, but resolution.

    • JJR

      You mean like,
      Whereas;
      The peg has continued it’s stubborn refusal to move in the face of Katia’s confusion.

      Be it Resolved;
      That Katia will strengthen her resolve via pseudo-legislative thoughts,
      That the peg will move in the face of this resolution,
      That this resolution will be empowered to enforce itself,

  • Psithief

    What I would like to see:
    • Adding comments becomes disabled for the latest update after one week until it’s not the latest update.

    Everybody wins.

    • JJR

      what?

    • As I Cry, ‘Dat Cat’

      Aww. You’re no fun. :<

    • tronn

      The comments are the best part between updates.

      • Cobweb

        The comments are the ONLY part between updates.

        • JJR

          Making it true that they are the best part, also the worst part.

      • Psithief

        All the clever comments are basically done within a week.
        Then it’s mostly bitching about the next update with progressively less civility.

  • She-Who-Waits

    *pokes with a stick*

    • JJR

      Hey, watch where you point that thing or you’ll put someones eye out.

      • 5_star_ownage

        AGHN My EYE

  • ThatOneCoolGuy

    I know Katia can do it but why does it seem so hard to her? Like just think of the powers she could have !!! I can see her shooting ice or missiles out of her face if she just believed she was worth it… Please Katia… BELIEVE!

    • Alex Franklin

      Unfortunately, believing in herself is a challenge in light of what she just went through last night. But if anyone can teach her the magic of Going a Little Crazy, it is probably this mad guardian spirit.

      • As I Cry, ‘Dat Cat’

        So a magical mad ghost is going to teach her the mind magic of going a bit mad?
        …
        Too much sense.

  • Cobweb

    This is actually a social experiment! The project is updated often for a time, then the updates are moved more and more far in between… the result is to see how long it will take for the fan base to go away and give up.
    Congratulations! You all proved it take more than 6 months! Next update will take an year…
    (Then, CocaCola buy the results. It’s entitled: Internet public tolerance to disappointment.)

    • JJR

      Who’s the control group?

      • Cobweb

        Hum… any web-comic public that have at least weekly updates will do as control group. I know many.

      • Who’s the control group?

        JJR, I could hug you so hard.

  • Stray Cat Acid

    o.O We might actually hit five hundred comments this update…

    • ya, but we will never beat the comment high-score and break disqus…. OR WILL WE?!

      • JJR

        There is only one way to find out.

  • Bob

    After three days of frenzied reading, this has to be the WORST time for me to have reached the end. Possibly the worst literary blue balls of my life, and that’s saying something. 100% distracted me from studying for finals, though. I’d shove money down the writer’s throat but I doubt that’d have much effect, I know how writing works.

    Not that I wouldn’t do it anyway. Eh?

    • As I Cry, ‘Dat Cat’

      Poetry.

      KAZERAD. Listen to this man.

      • unclevertitle

        Dude, if Kaz took people’s money then the people who feel entitled to receiving updates more often could potentially have LEGAL precedent to base their arguments on. Not to mention there’s the potential legal ramifications of making money off of a work of fanfiction.

        Granted if it’s just donations, it’s just donations. Bur soon enough you’d end up with people claiming Prequel as a scam, if they aren’t already. Or you’d have Bethesda’s paranoid lawyers pushing for lawsuit anyway like they did with Mojang over a trademark of the word “Scrolls.”

        • Bob

          Woah, hold your metaphorical equines (see what I did there?), nobody said anything about taking money. Like I said, giving donations for this webcomic probably wouldn’t make updates come faster. I’m not suggesting we all do this. People are ALREADY feeling entitled (I saw some butthurt squabbling and conspiracy theories) and if they donated money and STILL didn’t get weekly updates, they’d be outright furious.

          As far as Bethesda flipping out over somebody using their universe? I honestly haven’t a clue if they could get away with a lawsuit over that.

          All I’m saying is, if it were an option, I’d throw a few bucks out there, because this comic is GOLD and I’m getting it for free. Not saying donating should be a thing, not saying everyone should donate.
          /brush dust off shoulder

          • unclevertitle

            I have no idea if they could get away with it either or if they’d even bother to do it, but Bethesda’s certainly got the funds to waste on a frivolous lawsuit but I doubt that Kazerad does too.

            Granted, I too would probably donate from time to time if it were an option, but yeah it’s unclear whether or not it would be a good idea.

          • Bob

            I think he’d be fine, because he’s not necessarily making money off of TES, as it’s mostly his own work, and it’s donations, not a subscription. But that’s not a chance anybody would take. Although I’m sure if he put a donate link on his tumblr or something he’d get away with it.

            Probably not a good idea to do, though. Looking over this dismally long page of comments there are several accusing Kaz of laziness, and even one theorizing that every reason given for lateness is a lie. I’m gonna go ahead and guess that at least a few of these same people would also put money into it, not to be nice but rather to make it go faster. And then they’d rage here about it. And, I’m not Kaz, but if I were in Kaz’s position and people gave me money for the production of a comic, it would make me very guilty and less apt to do more work whenever I didn’t put out updates regular. Ergo making things snowball until I had a nervous breakdown over a webcomic.

            Then again, there was one guy who will remain unnamed who made a flash game that people liked, made a kickstarter for a new one with plans to hire help for production with a goal of 10k and walked away with 200k. I guess that could happen. That would be pretty cool. Was that a run-on sentence or just obscenely detailed?

  • Nulla_Metus

    “Bah, that’s the third time this week you’ve tripped over the TRAPDOOR TO THE TUNNELS. Sigrid really ought to press it down better. You make a mental note to mention this to her.”
    -captain Gaius. Others may have mentioned this, and it’s a bit off topic, but this seems to be the best way to get Katia’s belongings back.

    • unclevertitle

      But in order to flip the table that is convincing Katia to get her belongings back from Sigrid we must first solve the peg jumping Cracker Barrrel puzzle on top, that is Katia gaining her confidence back, telekinetically.

      Really, these metaphors don’t get more straightforward than this.

      • JJR

        What if she gets her confidence back by stealing her stuff back from Sigrid. There is very little risk because the Count of Kvatch has decided to punish people by making them sit in a chair and think about what they did.

        • unclevertitle

          Woah, wait. Are you suggesting that she flip the table without solving the puzzle on it first?

          That’s like. Mind = blown, man.

          Though really part of her confidence problem isn’t about just getting the stuff back and the reply to quill weave back, it’s also about her succeeding in magic. So I guess they’re more like two halves of the same flippable table and they both need to be flipped? Or something.

          • JJR

            But we already solved the puzzle, unless your saying we have to solve it by magic in order to use magic to flip the table?

          • Stray Cat Acid

            o.O You guys’ metaphors are making my brain hurt…

  • Cobweb

    You find 3 types of people in this world:
    _ The guy who never do anything special.
    _The guy who do and keep doing it until it become a great success.
    _the guy who do it to a point, then abandon it to excuses and laziness.

    The first guy people never notice, the second one is admired…
    but the last one is the worst…
    he is the one who let everyone down!

    It’s doesn’t matter if you don’t take money to do something, anything worth doing is worth doing well.

    • Anon

      I take it you’ve never had a bad set of times before, where you just can’t get shit done?

      Lucky bastard, but stop assuming he’s the 3rd guy.

      • Bob

        This.. Writing, or basically anything involving creation like music and drawing can go through major slumps, sometimes as a result of the dumbest things. Maybe things get busy, you get a little fatigued, the weather sucks, you’re having some unpleasant communications with a close friend, the light shines in your eyes when you’re sitting at the desk for two hours whenever you get home from work in this season… stupid shit that one wouldn’t expect to really have an impact can be disastrous when it comes to writing.

        Losing interest is a thing, too. A completely understandable thing which would make me very sad but sympathetic nonetheless.

    • JJR

      I’ve always heard that the three types were;
      those who can count,
      and those who can’t.

      • Ridesdragons

        Really? I was told that there were 10 types of people: those who understand binary, and those who don’t.

        • JJR

          No, the 10 types are;
          Those who understand quinary,
          Those who don’t,
          Those who were expecting a binary joke,
          Those who were expecting a trinary joke,
          And those who think this joke was bad and that I should feel bad.

          • As I Cry, ‘Dat Cat’

            And we just went quantum. This update’s comment section is awesome.

    • Uzi_Man

      Why keep doing something when you aren’t enjoying it anymore?

      Kazerad shouldn’t be updating this for anyone if it’s becoming boring to him. It’s shouldn’t be an obligation, it should be entertaintment.

      Excuses and laziness are silly statements. Being bored and tired of something is a perfect reason to leave it

      Besides, what he’s doing is not so special at all. He is not making your lives any better.

      • Hey did you ever heard about 4th type?
        _The guy who accomplished shit but will critize work of others

        This guy thinks he is awesome
        but he is not
        This guy is just like hemoroid.Once he shows up he is going to be pain in your ass :3

        You are right you are this guy Cobweb.You and your friend Uzi_Man…

        PS:If Kazerad stops prequel i am going to blame you because he will do it and he will do it because of bright and shining examples of morality like you.
        PSS:No offense
        PSSS:Ignore fact i said you are hemoroid

        Have a nice day

        • As I Cry, ‘Dat Cat’

          tfw: you realize your post is going to come across as way more offensive than you intended, so you start throwing things in to tone it down.

          • Nah i dont think soo…I am just mean and shit.Offensive is my middle name

          • As I Cry, ‘Dat Cat’

            OMGZ “Offensive” DENEK. Gotta admit, it has a ring to it. :3

          • I never laughed so hard.DENEK…….Man you almost killed me.
            It is suposed to look like this : OMG “Offensive” ZDENEK but your interpretation of my name is just better.

          • As I Cry, ‘Dat Cat’

            That makes sooo much more sense. ‘OMG-ZDENEK’ rolls off the tongue much easier.

          • Bonzohazard

            Pfft

        • Uzi_Man

          First of all, I was actually supporting Kazerad’s decision of leaving this comic. If he doesn’t enjoy working on this comic anymore but still does it to please all of you, then this is a self-forced false obligation and is not good for his soul.

          Second, this is a public webcomic that’s open to comments and we are the readers, so we have the absolute right to criticize his work. If he didn’t want this, he could simply disable the comment section and make the comic without taking in consideration the other people’s commands.

          Third.. your argument is illogical. You’re basically implying that we don’t have the right to judge an architect who built an inverted bridge just because we aren’t architects.

          And fourth.. no, that’s all.

          • To Uzi_Man

            First of all i know you are supporting Kazerad quiting and i said what i think about it.

            Secondly…You can say whatever you want but you have to expect reaction from others…as you can see i didnt say you have no right to comment or critize his work.What i said is what i think personaly of guys like you.

            Third…I am not implying shit.especially shit about inverted bridges and architect.You have right to judge architect who built inverted bridge and by all means you would be right but Kaz is not artist who made inverted or even bad comic.

            And fourth…Yes i still think you are hemoroid :3

          • Uzi_Man

            Let me clarify some of your statements.

            I’m not supporting Kazerad to quit. I’m just saying that if he WANTS to quit, he should feel free to do so because he is not tied (or shouldn’t be) to any of you.

            If you are saying I can say whatever I want, then why are you angry for hearing people criticizing? Doesn’t make sense, eh?

            I thought it was clear that this was just an example of our right as spectators to judge the work of others (in case of comics, only when we are asked to.. and we were). The bridge thing was just a methaphor.

            I’m not criticizing Kazerad or his comic (which is pretty good), I’m criticizing people who want to FORCE this guy to do the updates and don’t empathize with his POSSIBLE feelings (I say “possible” because he may or may not be bored with this)

            But enough of speaking for him, you already know what he replied to me.

            And I don’t care what a stranger thinks of me.

          • Now i am satisfied but i will comment only on your last sentence : And I don’t care what a stranger thinks of me.
            Good for you because even if you evaded fury of overprotective fan i still think you are pompous ass pain.

            Have a nice day

          • Uzi_Man

            Have a nice day too.

          • Here it will help you piss of others http://www.noswearing.com/dictionary

          • Kazerad

            Wait, what decision? I’m still here, I’ve just been too busy to update fast D=

            Also the website is still getting fixed.

          • A statistical breakdown of Kazerad’s comments:

            Announcing the release of a new Prequel update – 3%
            Being a loveable smart ass :3 – 30%
            Getting excited that someone’s doing something Prequel related cause now he gets to analyze it and gather more data for whatever sick experiment he’s conducting- 15%
            Blowing everyone’s fucking mind – 69%
            Freaking out that people on the internet are complaining – 0%
            Apologizing for the slowness of the updates – 50%
            Reassuring everyone that he is, in fact, still alive and that he does, in fact, wish to continue this comic – 90%

  • Khristopher

    I really feel like an idiot for checking this every day, but I love the story so much.
    Maybe get some help dude, or someone else to help you draw these faster? I miss the updates, and after what happened last year with the 6 month wait, I really thought things were going to change. What happened?

  • Skin Ticket

    I’ll not make assumptions as to why updates have suspended but I would really appreciate it if the author would at least keep us updated as to what’s going on.

  • Nappa

    At this rate (lets see its the middle of may, we’ve had 3 updates this year, if Kaz doesn’t update till June which is very possible, that’s 3 updates in 6 months) you can count on another 3 updates from now until christmas. You’re welcome.

    • Bonzohazard

      Precisely…. and thank you for clarifying that. It’s possible he might lose a few more grandmothers between now and then too, so let’s have our condolences ready.

  • alekksandar

    Perhaps Kaz has the writer’s or artist’s block or something. Give him time.

    • JJR

      What if we gave him some writer’s laxative instead, would that clear the block?

      • Bob

        If you invent writer’s laxative, you’re going to become one of the most thanked men in the world. You probably won’t make much money off it, though, because most of your customers will be starving. But thanks are worth something, yeah?

        • JJR

          I didn’t invent it, but if you need a substance that causes you to tell other people about all the words floating around your head; there is always alcohol.

  • MuscleWizard

    Wait a second, maybe it’s not YOU that should be confused, but rather the thing you’re trying to move! Maybe when you Summon Greater Bird Pun(tm) you’re actually convincing THE THING YOU’RE FOCUSING ON that IT’S A BIRD and it tried to do bird things like flap about and go skywards. And if you can convince things that they are birds… maybe we can plant a simpler suggestion.

    Katia: Focus on the table, remark on it’s magnificent weight and compliment it on it’s extraordinary ability to be heavy. Then politely -inform- it that it is currently on the ceiling, upside-down, and it’s fantastic and admirable weight should really be pulling it downwards, away from the ceiling it’s legs are currently touching and towards the very distant bluish-black floor that is actually beneath it.

    • Marcus Marky

      You should post this at the enter command section on the menu in the top-right

  • Jericoshost

    Did anyone else notice her amulet flashing after the puns?

    • JJR

      yes, stay strong puppy spirit.

  • dtlux14

    NO! IT’S OVER AFTER 12 LONG DAYS! It is time to go onto the side stories and hope there is an update soon. Katia has had about 4 days in 3 years, and I went over 3 years worth of stuff in 12 days. Time to go read the side stories I guess, I got nothing better to do while waiting for an update. BUT WHY MUST IT END D:

    • JJR

      What’s your favorite side story. Mine is Mikhail’s Quest. No matter how many times I go back to it, it’s still funny.

      • Whoops!

        Where did it go? Haha.

        Yeah, you fucked up.

        You can no longer be Mikhail’s Oblivion character because Mikhail’s Oblivion character’s insides have been liquefied.

        Gets me every time. C’:

      • dtlux14

        I will read them this weekend, haven’t gotten around to them yet. I love the update today though. I can’t believe that before I started to read this all those days ago, I didn’t know anything about the Elder Scrolls other than Skyrim was the 5th one. Now I am addicted to this, and want Oblivian.

  • An Explosion

    MOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOORE!
    Why do the good things always take so long to be updated?!?!?!

    • JJR

      I blame sampling bias. I only stick around waiting for updates if the thing is good, so it seems like only good things take a long time to update.

      • Good point. I was initially assuming it had to do with how the grass is always greener on the other side of the fence, but this makes more sense.

        Hmmm. Would you say the two are linked? Like, maybe sampling bias causes greener grassiness because you only really take in the positives of other situations while you see both the positives and the negatives of your current circumstance?

  • Uzi_Man

    Kazerad, why don’t you just make a Dragon Break to put a nice and coherent ending to this? Better to close the story than leaving it open.

    • Cobweb

      Better still. Put Catia Managan in the Public Domain. So anyone can continue it in their own blog or whatever.
      Because I guarantee you, this guy don’t do the job… but if someone do it. He will sue him.

      • Yewty

        Katia*

        Says the grammar Nazi.

      • tronn

        Really, Kazerad doesn’t strike me as particularly litigious person? Besides he doesn’t even own the IP Katia Managan is based on, so that cannot be good for a lawsuit.

      • Uzi_Man

        Problem is, if someone else does it, it probably won’t be the same because the updates will be done under other person’s vision of this webcomic.

        Well, it’s still better than how it is right now..

    • JJR

      This is the first time I’ve seen someone describe a dragon break as coherent.

    • Bob

      Looking back through the history, it’s gone through slumps. Shit happens, maybe he loses interest a bit… I’d rather see it end properly even if it takes longer. The story seems to be set or pre-written already, and I trust that it’s worth waiting to see. Maybe it’ll pick up in time, maybe it’ll become inactive. I’m willing to wait.
      In any case, we all feel the frustration due to slow updates. If you’re frustrated enough that you’d like it to just end, frequenting the website just to express your discontent won’t ease your pain. Perhaps give it a break, come back in a few months, see what’s happened.

  • Chada

    Alright, since his steam account has been online recently, we know he isn’t dead.

    However, having come from a family strife with anxiety, and through a number of large tragedies, I know how deeply life can be thrown off track for up to years at a time. Shit, I’m still recovering from the last time I fell on my face, a three-year string of mishaps that has been keeping me from graduating at U of M since the very first semester.

    So, just know that while there are numerous impatient detractors, also know that not only have many great artists taken long hiatuses between great works, but that you’re not alone, if that’s what’s troubling you.

    Good luck, brother.

    • chada

      Oh, but I forgot to include, if you never get back to this series, no worries. You’ll get complaints or whatever, but it’s far better to do what you love than to continue what you loath.

      • Bonzohazard

        Yes, and if he had the nuts to come out and say that, I’d have no contentions whatsoever! Unfortunately, he feels the need to drag out the inevitable…. grandmas hit by trains, planes crashing into his power lines…. terrorists hijacked his cpu… whatever bs so he can evade it a little longer.

  • JJR

    Time for some wild speculation.

    There has been some speculation floating around about whether Katia or some other character in this comic will become the main character in Oblivion. An idea that I have been toying with is that there will be no hero for the coming Oblivion crisis.

    Why? My thinking is that Oblivion has a hero because it is a video game with a person playing it, someone who takes the role of the hero. But this is not a video game, it’s a web comic about a video game. So who is playing it? No one. I think that the existence of this Oblivion-verse is the result of a test of the Radiant A.I. system. Or rather, a super version of it that gives the NPCs a lot more agency than we get in the released version of the game.

    What I mean by this is that the full game world is being run without the influence of a PC to make sure the NPC system is working/won’t break the game. But like I said this is some sort of Super Radiant A.I. system. Instead of having a simple schedule and a couple variables like responsibility; they have been given something more along the lines of complex motivations that, when combined with their knowledge of the world, generate the schedule that they follow.

    So what about that, well it means that the followers of the Mythic Dawn cult want to start opening up portals to Oblivion, but they can’t. The reason they can’t is because the PC is not there to trigger the event flags. They know nothing of video games or event flags though, all they know is that the plan isn’t going to plan. So they will take matters into their own hands and find a way to kick start the crisis without the PC.

    Their main opposition will come from a small set of NPCs on the other side. Specifically the adventuring NPCs. In this list I would include Katia, Gharug, ASOTIL, and maybe Stephane. Whereas most NPCs would be programed to act as, more or less, normal people; I think these ones are programmed to be other adventurers that could be met in the game.

    Naturally when the NPCs solve the main quest of the game it will lead to the developers toning down the A.I and getting rid of the more proactive NPCs, leading to the version of the game we got in the real world.

    Or maybe not, it all sounds so much sillier now that I’ve spelled it all out.

    • Ridesdragons

      this reminds me of how spongebob draws a circle.

      first, he draws a head, then he erases all of the details, then all of the extra lines, and voila, a perfect circle.

      • JJR

        So… an unnecessarily complicated method to arrive at the correct answer?

        • How about an incredibly awesome and vastly superior way to arrive at the correct answer? I’d laugh so hard if this is actually how Kazerad plans out his comic.

          • JJR

            The point is, “correct answer” is the thing I am hearing, which is not what I expected.

    • Bob

      It’s a logical line of thought and potentially valid by all means. But it’s one of those things where it’s a huge train of thought that even a writer probably doesn’t go through when coming up with a story idea. Basically, I’m saying you’ve thought out something probably more complex than the writer himself thought out.

      Wrong or otherwise, worthy of applause… put this kind of thinking into a creation of your own, and I think you’re in good shape.

  • I am going to re-read this thing

  • Nerium

    Anyway, figuring out telekinesis seems like a pain, so why don’t you try life-detection first? That should be pretty easy. Just remember that feeling then you took off your eyepatch, how it was beautiful and refreshing to see with both eyes again, that very ease. In any case, asking Aggy about your talent in life-detection seems like a good idea.

    • JJR

      Hey, that’s right, we have that spell, sort of. If Katia is going to break into the mage’s guild the ability to see Sigrid through the walls would be very valuable.

      • unclevertitle

        I think that was more a side effect of the barbecue sandwich than anything else. Bread and other potential ingredients in the sandwich have Detect Life as one of their alchemical effects.

        http://www.uesp.net/wiki/Oblivion:Detect_Life

        • JJR

          So, that would make it a rat meat sandwich? That sounds kind of racist, or speciesist.

  • Bonzohazard

    Seasons chaaaange, time passes byyyyy, as the weeks become the months become the yeeears…. Just so you know, Kaz has lost a grandmother, an uncle by marriage, a second cousin, a goat, two llamas and a safari of pygmies from the African interior…. it’s a sad time, and the grave is still hungry. Let’s all calm down and cut the guy some slack shall we?

    • Bob

      Jeez, if I lost a goat.. Shit, I can’t even begin to understand. I don’t even own a goat and I’m overwhelmed by the thought of losing one. RIP in peace goat.

      Wait, there’s a dead goat in all of this? Sounds like the perfect opportunity for some dark Satanic rituals.

        • Bob

          Oh my god… I’m sicking the internet police on these people for visual rape and the annihilation of innocence.

  • Seajay

    A long time ago, in a galaxy far far away…
    Kaz updated prequel

  • Brentashun

    I wonder if this story goes on it’s own adventure, or collides with Oblivion’s story.

  • Stray Cat Acid

    I’d put money down that we wouldn’t see 600 comments, if it weren’t so obvious that I’d lose that bet. :[

    • As I Cry, ‘Dat Cat’

      Should’ve put that money down.

  • Combak

    Spelling goof on the next page. Ctrl+F: wichhunter

    • Kazerad

      Woah, fuck, this brings up a bigger issue: didn’t realize had comments disabled.

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